I'm not sure how many of you all will be able to relate, but I am a first-gen student. A first-generation student, defined at my school, is a student whose parents did not graduate from a four-year college or university. Especially if you happen to be the oldest sibling (or an only child), being the first in your family to attend college is seriously stepping blindly into unknown territory.
There is only so much of college life you can learn from movies and social media. If you are like me, your parents' stories of their own experiences have in some way--no matter how small--shaped how you perceive the world. So, what do you do when you step into a realm in which Mom and Dad cannot teach you from their experiences? You teach them from your own experience.
Let's face it. There some understood aspects of college culture that you only realize when you have an insider's perspective.
1. Frat shoes/"going out" shoes.
Because nothing stirs your stomach for cafeteria brunch at noon on a Saturday quite like last night's beer/vomit/mud/other brownish liquid-stained Converse strewn across the dorm corridors. Actually, the influence of the Greek scene, in general, is, at least for me at my small liberal arts university, an aspect of college life for which I was totally unprepared.
2. "Early" classes
Yes, Dad, a 9:30 class is early when you go to bed at 2:00 A.M. every night.
3. Grades
High school: Eh, another A. Not a high A, but that's not too bad I guess.
College: OH THANK GOD. I GOT A B-.
4. RAs
Your mom probably assumes the senior down the hall will fill the "mom-sized" gap in your day-to-day life. You know, someone who helps you with your homework, bakes you cookies, breaks up fights and gives you sage advice when you're down. You, however, have probably forgotten who your RA even is. You explain to your mom that "RA" means someone who has free housing and vanishes on the weekends to avoid being responsible for pre-game parties.
5. Pre-Gaming.
Hanging out and drinking before going out and drinking. The logic obtained by a college education.
6. Stickers
They're on laptops, cell phones, water bottles, thermoses, notebooks, guitars, vehicle bumpers, doors, windows--everywhere. They announce to the rest of the campus where you are from, what clubs you are a part of, what major you study, what religion you practice, what foods you eat, and what movies you watch. Your entire identity is on display every time you take a drink in class.
7. Religiously checking the weather
You're most likely walking everywhere, every day on campus. Dressing according to the weather is not just "cute" anymore. It's an act of survival.
8. Free food
Because it's the surest way any club or event can entice college students to come. Mom and Dad didn't really need to buy that $2,500 meal plan. If you took the time and effort, you could probably strategize and have at least one free meal every single day.
9. Having random friends in random contexts
"No, mom, not my friend Caroline from anthropology class who studies with me, the Caroline who went hiking with me two weekends ago. No, you're thinking of my friend Abigail, who is Jason's ex-girlfriend. We meet for coffee at Starbucks on Wednesdays, remember?
No, my friend Jason is on the club-lacrosse team. Yeah, he plays with my friend Max who has a crush on my roommate Jenny. They're in the same biology lab with my friend Julia. Yeah, Julia. Who volunteers with me at the animal shelter every Sunday."
10. Having random days
Your mother calls you to wish you luck on your huge Spanish exam, but she doesn't realize that you're painting a flower pot on the quad for the sustainability club. You try to call her back but run out of time on your way to a lecture on intercultural awareness.
She finally calls you after you've taken the exam, asks you how work was. You say work on Tuesdays, today is Wednesday, and your plans for the evening include a cross-fit class and dinner at a professor's house.
Essentially, having to explain to parents that college is really just doing random things with random people.
And not being able to explain how it's the best experience of your life.--an experience you can claim as yours and yours alone.
