5 Reasons You Should Look For Your Bridesmaids — Not The Groom — In College
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Student Life

5 Reasons You Should Look For Your Bridesmaids — Not The Groom — In College

Who else are you going to call at 3 a.m. to jam out to the Cheetah Girls and eat ice-cream with?

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5 Reasons You Should Look For Your Bridesmaids — Not The Groom — In College

This same concept also applies to young men in search of groomsmen rather than a bride.

College is a HUGE adjustment. As a first-year student in college, I have been introduced to many pressures around me. These pressures include: avoiding the "freshman 15," having excellent grades, going to lots of parties to "fit in," never being alone (i.e. befriending as MANY people as possible), and finding your soulmate.

While these pressures are negative, there are also positive aspects to them.

For example, there is nothing wrong with wanting to stay in shape. However, life is more than fitting in your jeans. In the same way, even though many people marry someone they met in college, this should not be your first priority, especially if you are new to college.

Here are the reasons why:

1. You need your feet on the ground first.

When you get to college, your entire life is turned upside down. You are stuck between not being in your old life and not quite being in the real world. You are expected to figure a lot of things out, sometimes alone, and that is where the most growth takes place.

At this point in your life, you likely haven't found exactly who you are yet. It is a time of uncertainty, doubt, and fear. Jumping into a relationship isn't a good idea. Take this into consideration: you can't grow a flower if the sun is afraid to shine or if the water doesn't want to share. In order to be strong in a relationship, you must be strong on your own.

You must mature and learn how life works on your own. Then, you can come together and help something beautiful bloom.

2. You have to be able to love yourself before you can love someone else.  

Ever hear the expression self-love? Of course, you have; it's overused today for a reason! In other words, cut yourself some slack. Be easy on yourself. Drown yourself in love and appreciate the person you are. College can be a very scary place. You can get caught up in all of your responsibilities, wants, and needs. When things become too hard to handle, your mental health may also suffer.

With college being a distinct place for people to not know who they are, it is easy to not take time for yourself. When you get to a healthy place where you know who you are and what your purpose is, then you can fully appreciate and love another human being.

3. A supportive community is more important than a boy.

When you get to college, it can be a very lonely place; it is one of the most uncertain times of your life. If you jump right into a relationship, it could end tragically for a number of reasons. To start, you need to find people who love, appreciate, and accept you! They will be the people you go to for everything...the ones who never leave. you. As the saying goes, "boys will come and go, but true friends will never leave."

There is just a different dynamic between your best friends and boyfriend. There are some things that only your best friends will understand. And remember quality over quantity. Think about it. You should strive to have friendships deep enough where you would want them at your wedding. You wouldn't have someone you barely know stand beside you.

4. You gotta let loose! 

Often times when a person is in search of a significant other, it can add unnecessary stress and pressure onto their plate. When a person is still fresh to college, it can quickly become overwhelming. Trying to juggle social, love, work, and educational life can cause people to become uptight and spread thin. Being single for the first bit of college allows people to relax.

Going out with girlfriends can be the remedy to fix this. It can be comforting to talk to people who are in the exact same boat as you. Taking the time to have fun and relax with friends can improve your mood and mental health as well. Instead of worrying about your appearance and every move with a guy that you like, you can spend the night in your dorm with friends. Who else are you going to call at 3 a.m. to jam out to the Cheetah Girls and eat ice-cream with?

5. Education is the top priority- that's why you're here! 

No offense, but are you really throwing thousands of dollars down the drain to dismiss your schooling and focus on a boy? No! The entire reason why you are enrolled in your university is to get a good education that will prepare you for your dream job. If it gets to the point where your grades are dropping and the amount of time you are spending with someone you are interested in is increasing, then there is a problem.

Once all of your commitments to school are out of the way, then you can decide how much time you want to put into a boyfriend.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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