“Perhaps I am stronger than I think.” – Thomas Merton
Four years of college sounds like a lifetime, until you get into it. That first year of trying to find your footing and what works best with your schedule, is a blur. You come out of your first round of finals praying that Christmas break drags on and on, then January hits and your books and a whole new round of classes and professors is staring you in the face.
Sophomore year feels like hell; you aren’t sure why, but it just does. And any college aged person will tell you that, that is how it’s supposed to be. That second year, in the mind of a naïve little freshman, is supposed to be the year that you prove to everyone that all those pitfalls and late night crying sessions in the bathroom were a onetime deal and they’ll never happen again. But we all know you’re wrong, because sophomore year is the year that you will want to quit, drop out, and run back home to your parents, but it isn’t quite that simple. But luckily fall and spring semester will come and go then you’ll be in the awkward phase of, I’m not exactly a teenager anymore, but I don’t think I’m the traditional image of an adult either.
Junior year will hold more truths than anything for you. This is the year that everyone is coming into their own and becoming an “actual adult”; you’ll start paying your own bills because you have a job, you’ll start going to bed at a decent time because you have responsibilities, and you’ll call your parents more often just to talk. Your friend group will get smaller as different people find a place that they fit better or you simply outgrow each other, and this is okay, not everyone is meant to stay in your life forever. Your class load won’t feel like it is crushing you and your professors will be more than willing to help you prepare for the journey that is senior year and graduation.
Senior year will feel like a series of trials; but the payout come May will be what makes it all worth it. All the last minute projects and papers you will be cramming in, while looking for a full time job after graduation, and trying to balance a social life because all your friends are going in different directions; this is what will hurt. You will find that senior year is not the breeze that you imagined it would be, because you come to the conclusion that you have ten months to get your life together and start working on that future that you pay $160,000 for (if you took the private school route like I did).
You will learn just how cruel time can be. Time will not wait for you to catch up on all of the things that you have to do, it will be pushing you and eventually dragging you; you will often times feel behind and like things are passing by before your eyes. Four years will feel like the blink of an eye; one day you’re 18 and moving into your new dorm room and the next minute you’re 22 and making sure that your graduation gown is the right size and that your cap fits your head correctly.
You will find so many debunked truths during your time in college. You will learn that you can in fact pull two all-nighters in a row; that coffee actually does not help you focus and can become a serious addiction; and that your best friends will not always be your best friends. College is about experience, it is about learning and growing; you become a person that you never imagined that you could be.
You will learn the truths and heartaches of falling in love in your twenties. You will break hearts and you will have your heart broken. And there will always be that one person that you feel screwed you up so badly, you will blame them for almost everything that is wrong with you relationship wise and you will harbor so much hatred for them. However, you will also learn to let this go. You will move on, eventually. And life will get easier and you will learn to breathe on your own again.
You will find the truth behind people telling you that grades don’t matter. And to an extent, they don’t, but your GPA will follow you wherever you go. You will want to apply for grad school; your GPA is going to really matter. You will want that beautifully paying job that wants to see your college transcript; your GPA will matter. Your grades do not define you as a person, but they will often times define how far you go in life.
Through all of these truths, you will find the biggest one inside yourself. You will find that you, as a unique individual, are so much stronger than you think you are. You will look back and see that you have survived four years of wanting to cry and give up and go home to your mommy, but you didn’t. You pushed through and pushed yourself, you found out who you are and what you want. Now hold your head high and go get what you want.
