Growing up, we've read literature and seen movies under the genre of 'Coming-of-Age.' But when do we finally get there? How do we know?

I've been able to do a lot of self-reflecting this summer, my summer before my first year in college. So far, I've already turned 18, I've already got my license, doctor's ask for my permission; all of this independence and responsibility gained in just turning one age. Does this mean I've 'come of age?'

Not exactly.

The stories we hear and see reflect on relatable experiences about the [pre-teen and teenager] phase of finding ourselves. Whether it's by trying new things, exploring the world, resolving a conflict - they're all situations we learn from. But to 'come of age' means something more than just learning. It's how we apply ourselves after that, as I've finally learned. Quite frankly, I don't feel like I've applied myself enough, which has lead me to feel a kind of emptiness inside without any feeling of true accomplishment. I've always wanted to be the mature one growing up, always feeling five years older in my head than my actual physical self, thinking that being mature would automatically make me cool, or strong enough to take on the world. Boy, was I wrong.

I've disappointed many, myself included. I've hurt many, myself included. I've lost many, myself included. This has all been a part of the journey that I like to think has lead to my final 'coming of age' stage. But the experience isn't all negative. I've also laughed until I cried, smiled until my cheeks hurt, loved until my heart burst. But as they say, curiosity kills the cat. And I was that cat.

It's a good thing cats have nine lives, at least! But mine were all used up, and it was time to face reality without a "second-chance." That's when I had my epiphany. I came to a different understanding of the world around me, and it became a lot bigger than I've ever imagined. Up to this point, I have learned that there exists multiple worlds outside of my own. Yes, multiple. It seemed to me that everyone was in their own world with their own problems to solve, adversities to face, and opportunities to take. So, my perspective shifted to a broader spectrum. Kinda.

I admit. All of this soul-searching, coming-of-age-transitioning, and what-is-my-place-in-this-world-seeking, does not make me the wisest person ever or the next big philosopher. I am not saying I know everything now, but to 'come of age' for me has gained a whole new meaning - becoming your true self and letting everyone know who you can be or who you will become.

I admit, I have not been the truest version of myself I can be. Especially in this day and age when it seems like social media drives almost every image, reputation, and level of significance to yourself, it's hard not to want to make yourself feel important. When you're trying to find your best fit, or discover who you are and what your purpose in the world is, you can get lost. Up until now, I've tried so hard in my life to let everyone else know the person I can be, that I personally never became satisfied. I knew I could somehow always do better; there was always room for improvement.

A vast array of quotes lay around for us to read to spark this 'coming-of-age' epiphany - "It's about the journey, not the destination," "every bad thing will have a good outcome, or at least a lesson learned," "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." You hear them everywhere, as they have become the words to ignitehope in those who have lost their way on their own journeys to 'come of age.'

Whether I truly belong in the in-crowd, or a small majority on the outskirts, or maybe even a little bit of both, I've learned that in whichever direction I choose to embark, I am responsible for myself and what I do both good and bad. No one will tell me where to go, I can only take the advice I am given. I have to start applying myself. The only thing that kept me from doing so was developing a moral line. But one thing is for sure, I will never be the same. I've finally had that life-changing moment I needed to give myself a wake-up call; it was a smack in the face, and in the heart. People won't always remember words, or actions, but they will remember feelings. This is one feeling I will never forget.

And so with that, I believe the most cliche line probably known to man, "Everything happens for a reason."