If you haven’t been in a long-term relationship, you might not know these things. Being with someone is the greatest feeling, but it isn’t always sunshine and butterflies. If you’re dating someone, you will fight. You will get so angry at them that you don’t even want to see their face.
Some people might say “Oh, my boyfriend and I never fight.” If you and your significant other don’t fight, I’d venture to say that either you haven’t been together very long, or someone is unhappy and won’t say anything. Not fighting is not realistic. Sorry.
Guys, fighting sucks. It really does. It hurts. Every fight I get into with my boyfriend leaves me feeling drained and defeated. But when you take a step back and think, fighting isn’t always a bad thing.
When one person stops fighting, it’s because they don’t care anymore. In my last relationship, I fought with him for the longest time because I had burned out all my energy. I gave up. I no longer cared if we stayed together or not. But in my current relationship, I continue to fight, because I care about the outcome.
Fighting also teaches communication and conflict resolution. Once you’re past the angry stage, you’ll better be able to explain what the problem is, why it’s important to you, and how you think it should be fixed. Your SO can do the same, and either you two can come to a compromise or let one person have their way because it clearly means more to them.
Personally, I have a problem with giving up and letting him have his way. When I argue, I am here to win — at least at first. After awhile, I just want it to stop, even if it means I can’t get what I want. But we always make up, and I am big enough to let go of my pride and my stubbornness to apologize for where I am wrong.
Now, I’m not saying you should pick fights over every little thing, and if that’s the message you got from this, start this article over, because clearly, you missed something along the way. No, I’m saying that it’s not a bad thing for couples to fight. Every day? Maybe not healthy. Every once in awhile? It’s normal.
My bottom line is, fighting doesn't mean you don't love each other. But don’t expect your relationship to be perfect forever. It won’t be. Relationships take work. They’re hard, and sometimes, they require sacrifice. But if you love that person, and you aren’t having to compromise your own values for them, then it’s worth it, don’t you think?
