I Am A Proud Feminist, But I Used To Be Ashamed About It

I Am A Proud Feminist, But I Used To Be Ashamed About It

How I learned the real meaning of being a feminist
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fem·i·nist, feminist: noun

1. a person who supports feminism.

fem·i·nism, feminism: noun

1. the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.

Based on those definitions, I am a feminist. And I am not ashamed to be one. But if someone asked me if I was a feminist back when I was 15 or 16, I denied any relationship with the word.

Why?

Because to me, at that time, it meant being a "man-hater," a power-hungry activist, someone who was assertive or demanding. Someone who wanted to be better than men, or to make them seem obsolete. It's clear to see that at that time, I had no idea what it truly meant. I'm happy to say I know better now.

I am a feminist because my rights should be equal to men. I shouldn't have to work twice as hard to make less. I want to be a mother someday and I want my children to feel safe and proud of who they are in the world.

Because I was a college student who had been told that when I traveled abroad for a semester and got verbally and physically harassed, I should have just let it happen. And now, as a post-grad searching for a full-time job, I've been asked why I don't go into a field "more suited for me as a woman."

No one would dare say that to my male counterparts. But to me, as a woman? I've lost count of how many times it has happened to me. And a lot of times, I've let it slide. But not anymore.

I shouldn't have to walk in fear to my house every night when it is dark or feel compelled to call someone, anyone, on my phone just in case something happens. I have to clutch my keys in my pocket and remember the self-defense moves I learned on the Internet, just in case. I shouldn't have to worry if I'm being too loud or assertive in front of my male counterparts.

But more importantly, no one, regardless of gender identity, should have to worry about these things. This is what I am fighting for. I'm not fighting to be "better than men". I'm not fighting to have all of the power. I'm fighting for equal rights for everyone

I am a feminist. And while I used to be ashamed of the word, I am no longer so.

And if you have a problem with it, that's fine. I'd be more than happy to discuss those problems with you.

But please know that I am not planning on changing my ideas anytime soon. I am proud of who I am. And I hope one day all women can be proud of who they are too.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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37 Things Growing Up in the South Taught You

Where the tea is sweet, but the people are sweeter.
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1. The art of small talking.
2. The importance of calling your momma.
3. The beauty of sweet tea.
4. How to use the term “ma'am” or “sir” (that is, use it as much as possible).
5. Real flowers are way better than fake flowers.
6. Sometimes you only have two seasons instead of four.
7. Fried chicken is the best kind of chicken.
8. When it comes to food, always go for seconds.
9. It is better to overdress for Church than underdress.
10. Word travels fast.
11. Lake days are better than beach days.
12. Handwritten letters never go out of style.
13. If a man doesn’t open the door for you on the first date, dump him.
14. If a man won’t meet your family after four dates, dump him.
15. If your family doesn’t like your boyfriend, dump him.
16. Your occupation doesn’t matter as long as you're happy.
17. But you should always make sure you can support your family.
18. Rocking chairs are by far the best kind of chairs.
19. Cracker Barrel is more than a restaurant, it's a lifestyle.
20. Just 'cause you are from Florida and it is in the south does not make you Southern.
21. High School football is a big deal.
22. If you have a hair dresser for more than three years, never change. Trust her and only her.
23. The kids in your Sunday school class in third grade are also in your graduating class.
24. Makeup doesn’t work in the summer.
25. Laying out is a hobby.
26. Moms get more into high school drama than high schoolers.
27. Sororities are a family affair.
28. You never know how many adults you know 'til its time to get recommendation letters for rush.
29. SEC is the best, no question.
30. You can't go wrong buying a girl Kendra Scotts.
31. People will refer to you by your last name.
32. Biscuits and gravy are bae.
33. Sadie Robertson is a role model.
34. If it is game day you should be dressed nice.
35. If you pass by a child's lemonade stand you better buy lemonade from her. You're supporting capitalism.
36. You are never too old to go home for just a weekend… or just a meal.
37. You can’t imagine living anywhere but the South.



































Cover Image Credit: Grace Valentine

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8 things that can easily offend a black girl

This also applies to many minorities.

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I surveyed different black girls from various backgrounds and here are their responses!

1. "Is that your hair?"

Please NEVER ask a black girl this unless you wear hair extensions or you happen to be GOOD friends. If you dare to be so bold, you may be cursed out or slapped! Fair warning!

2. "Can I touch you hair?"

Just how dumb it looks!

Solange and Beyonce have said it ENOUGH! I think it's safe to say that hair is OFF LIMITS, unless you're a lady of color or wear extensions. FYI women of color are NOT your personal petting zoo! So do NOT ask to touch our hair. It's very degrading and this could also lead to being SLAPPED!

3. "What are you mixed with?"

For those of you who don't know, women of color come in MANY different shades. Just because a girl has a lighter complexion doesn't mean that she isn't fully black. This also means that just because a black girl has fine textured hair, light colored eyes, or common euro-centric features doesn't mean she is not fully black!

4. "You're pretty for a black girl."

Did this bitch just say that?

If this sentence, or any variation of this sentence has ever left your lips, please PUNCH yourself! Although, the intention is meant to be a compliment, it is also a way to say that most black girls aren't beautiful! Such a statement would reiterate a stereotype that it is uncommon for black women to be beautiful.

5. "You are very articulate." ( Often said with such SHOCK)

DUHHHHHH

​YES, black girls do attend school. It is actually required by law, and although our culture partakes in ebonics and slang, we are also very well aware of how to speak proper english. This is also a great time to point out that proper english does NOT BELONG TO WHITE PEOPLE. Minorities can speak english too!

6. "I have a black friend."

For some odd reason, people tend to blurt this particular statement out when surrounded by women of color. I would like to first say just because this comment is said or is true, doesn't mean you're not prejudice. I believe such statements are meant to make us feel more comfortable, but they actually do the opposite. In fact, this statement would only be said by someone who is actually trying to hide their prejudicial feelings behind their ONE black friend!

7. "Oh, well, you're different."

This statement often comes up after a racist comment was made. "Oh, well, you're different," only implies that other black people are not, and stereotypes are facts.

8. Singing/rapping N**** in a song is still WRONG

If you are NOT a person of color do NOT sing, rap, hmm, text, or even write this word. THANK YOU.

Cover Image Credit:

Oprah Winfrey Instagram

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