I’m pretty stressed.
It’s almost the end of my college career, and that means a few things.
1. I will leave my university permanently in one week.
I return only to graduate and retrieve the rest of my things from my apartment.
2. I will no longer have homework for the rest of forever.
This is somehow liberating and simultaneously frightening because this was my entire life for seventeen years, not counting daycare and preschool learning.
3. I have to go to work for the next 30+ years.
I’m not even 30 yet! I don’t have a really good grasp on what 30 years of life looks like.
What all that amounts to is this: I have to really and truly grow up.
Yes, I pay for things on my own and don’t get my parents’ help. Yes, everything I use and own is paid for completely and registered in my name. But, that all begins to mean something different when you have to enter the workforce full time.
I always knew exactly what was before me, months and even years in advance at times. I am a little OCD to combat a LOT of ADHD, and I’ve always considered myself a go-getter. I like having a plan, I like knowing where things are going, and I like to know and study all the details. In September of 2014, for example, I knew I would be at my university in August of 2015, 11 months prior if you’re counting. Before that, I had years of public school left to finish.
I’m cutting it close by not having a job offer, and I’m struggling with that as I watch my friends and acquaintances nail their interviews and nab some pretty coveted positions.
Things are going to change, and from where I’m sitting, that’s a scary thought. Not knowing exactly what is going to happen to me for the next 4 years, or even 1 year, gives me a level of anxiety unsurpassed by any all-nighter, final exam, or missed alarm that I’ve experienced before.
If you are a graduating college senior, perhaps you’re feeling this too. Some of you all have had multiple job offers for months and have had the opportunity to sit back, let graduation season take its course, and go buy some new biz casual clothes for the first day of work in June. However, many of us are in my situation. We don’t know what’s coming. We can’t tell you “what [we’re] going to do with [our] major”, although we love getting that question 47 times a week.
To all my fellow graduating seniors, what I can tell you is this: graduation is coming, whether you are ready for it or not, but the unknown shouldn’t scare you. It should motivate you.
You have been given the gift of a fresh start. You have the freedom to take that dumb Myers-Briggs quiz again, or an aptitude test, or a Buzzfeed quiz about what kind of cheese you are, for all I care. You can find your true passion, even if it has to be done after you get a job that will get you by.
The thing about that first job? It’s rarely your last job anymore. In this day and age, you can hop from a “meh” job to a good job to a great job if you want. Or you can stop working your normal 9-5, write a book or start a vlog, begin a business, and make money from home.
The point is, it doesn’t matter what you do, exactly. Make a lot of money, do what you love, or both. Start an organization in your community and become active in city affairs. Go on a lot of Tinder dates. See a movie by yourself so you don’t have to share the popcorn.
Live life.
See the world.
It’s your oyster, yada-yada.
Your life is a clean slate. Go decorate it.
