Home is behind.

I couldn't tell you how many sleepless nights I have spent looking up in the sky when it is clear, and seeing the moon in full, or waxing/waning. The lights in battalion pollute the starlight, making only the brightest visible. I would sit outside to think about where I've been, and where I'm going. For the longest time I have been adamant about how much my home town has its perks and I wanted to save it. It's where I grew up, where most of my friends and family are and it's where I was shaped into who I am. But I've now come to realize that despite my nostalgia and love for my roots, it's time to start looking ahead. It's time to look towards the bigger world outside of it, and to grow up.

I'm leaving.

My first extended stay away from home was freshman year of college. Though I could have chosen from many options, I took the road less traveled and came to The Citadel. I was a nice guy when I came here, loyal to friends and family, kind to others (perhaps too much), and I tried to be a person who helped everyone I could. Despite having the best intentions and a good heart, I had a lot of growing up to do; and admittedly, probably a little more. I realize now there is a difference between a nice guy, and a good man. A nice guy is one who does everything to try and please everyone. He tries to get everyone to get along, and is so bent on helping others, he lets them walk all over him without any resistance. A nice guy will let others have their way instead of refusing, because he doesn't want to be a problem. He is weak.

A good man is different. He recognizes the value in being kind to others and helping those in need, and he does it, but he knows his limits. He knows where to draw the line between being nice to others and helpful to those in need, and being a push over who let's everyone get their way because he's "too nice" to say no. A good man knows that peace is always a virtue worth fighting for, and he will promote peaceful arrangements and agreements if possible. However, he also knows that there is a season to everything: and that includes action. Specifically, actions that may not always be the most peaceful, but will be what is right in the end; he will know the line between peace talks with a nation who views him as equal, and talks that pander to the whims of a tyrannical, oppressive government because war is too scary. A good man will defend the weak, and slay the wicked ones who seek to destroy them. Yet, he will also know that even the enemy can be saved, and that those who fall to darkness, can be brought back to light. But most importantly, to me at least, he knows when to stay, and when it is time to say good bye.

I have learned this with difficulty. I have been exposed to new ideas and thoughts. I have been shown that I saw the world through rose-colored lenses and that I could not see that which I did not want to believe was there. It was about time I grew up. I know now, that despite as much as I love my friends and family, and as many good memories as I have, it's time to leave home behind and face the world ahead. It's time to start taking life more seriously and get to work, because we are entitled to nothing, despite what my generation likes to believe. If we want to start making a better world for ourselves and for our children, it will not be done by pandering to the cries of every single person who wants to be different and feel special, even though they have nothing special or unique to offer, and start putting value in hard work and dedication. You know, like people used to do? Back when you got promotions for excelling at your job and going above and beyond your duties, not just for doing the bare minimum and then complaining you weren't making enough.

Sure, the economy has tanked, college is expensive and minimum wage isn't enough to feed a family of four. But I'll let you in on a little secret: complaining about it and not actually offering a legitimate solution is just whining and won't fix anything. You reap what you sow, and bare minimum effort will get you bare minimum pay. As much as I hate to see people struggle, and as much as I want to help, I have finally realized an important lesson in life: you can't help someone who won't help themselves. Instead of letting myself get dragged down into a place that isn’t going anywhere, I'm getting out; and I'm going to help myself. It might be selfish, but in reality, I could never pull anyone out of the flood, if I'm not on solid ground. So, with a heavy heart, I will soon bid farewell to Lancaster, South Carolina, follow the road, and see where it takes me.