Growing up I had a huge family, like hundreds of aunts, uncles, and cousins. So many I had to be reminded of who everyone was at family gatherings. Now I probably wouldn't recognize them anymore. See my family hasn't talked to me in about 8 years. Before you ask if I did anything wrong or something to upset them, here's some insight: I was 14 years old, I have never been arrested, beat teen pregnancy, done drugs, and I am currently a senior at a division one college. So what did little me do that made you all cut me out of your lives? What happened to family is forever? How can you just cut me out like I wasn't blood?
It's been 8 years and I love my little family, my mom, my uncle and his son, and my boyfriend and his family that has welcomed me with open arms these past five years.
I do get sad when I think of all the family traditions I grew up loving and on holidays feeling a little blue when I think of the memories I had with you all. How those will probably never happen again and how I don't deserve the way you all treat me. I think about when I was younger and planning my wedding and realizing I would have to have a guest list of over 150 for just my family, and now I'll only be inviting like less than 10 family members for the bride's side. I think of how many of you all won't be at my college graduation when I could've taken up a section of the arena and had the loudest cheer section next year. But now I won't have to worry about getting your address for invites. I get sad when I realize that I have cousins that were born and have grown up never meeting or knowing who I am, that I don't even know their names or what they look like. I guess that's my family though, you all just cut those out who didn't put up with your bullshit. I shouldn't have been 14 and told that I wasn't someone's grandchild because I was and I am. I shouldn't have to look at photos on Facebook and cry because I am left out of another 'family' event. Sometimes I believe you all choose to love and believe the wrong kid, and I'm sorry you all did. You all visit my college town for one of my cousins and yet never think to message me and see what I'm doing and if I want to see you all? No, you don't. I used to babysit your kids, you used to babysit me, we used to have so many memories and inside jokes together that just get sad to remember.
So to the family that is Facebook friends with me but for the past 8 years have never messaged me once to ask how I am doing or to invite me to a family holiday:
I'm doing pretty freaking amazing. I have a wonderful boyfriend, I'm on my last year of college, I live independently on my own, I am in an amazing sorority who has given me some great friends. I have had some struggles, but I have come back from them stronger than ever.
I want to thank my mom and uncle for being an amazing little family for me. I want to thank my boyfriends family for accepting me and being the extended family I have needed since mine stopped caring for me.
I am a good kid that you all stopped loving, stopped caring, stopped inviting and I'm sorry you are missing out on a wonderful person. Maybe this article will reach you, maybe you'll reach out and maybe I'll respond, but if history has taught me anything it's that you all will remain at distance from me and my life.
