In my lifetime I have known three very different family dynamics personally. The first vivid memory of family I have would be of my mother, her husband and my sister and I at a park. This in some way is looked at as a regular family dynamic by our society. My second memory of family was without my mother’s husband, just my little sister, our mother and me. The second is still somewhat viewed in our society as normal or at least somewhat normal. However, my third memory of a family dynamic is of my mother her girlfriend and the children they have combined, if that makes any sense. I have known the later for quite a few years now and to be honest I have no issue with it, although society may not view this as normal.
While having a conversation with a friend one day walking through Walmart I could see a family two men and their daughters from afar off and my friend made a comment that basically said “well that’s not normal, how will the child grow up knowing a normal family dynamic?” Now at first I just stopped and looked at the girl because I was not sure if she meant to say her thoughts out loud or if she was being serious. Our society is changing every day, things that were never accepted are now being widely accepted by the world; however, there are some things such as something as trivial as the family dynamic that some could be so closed minded about. So, I decided to explain to her the various family dynamics that are seen as normal by various persons in our culture.
Mother and Father
This is what seems to be deemed “normal” by our society. The mother and father are often married, and the children have both parents in the home. For some families this could be a good thing, but on the other hand it could also be bad. In my case having a mother and father – or a step father in my case was not really an ideal situation for my family.
Single Parent Home
Whether it be just your mother or just your father they are the ones taking care of you. In my case, it was my mother, who made sure we were taken care of. From my point of view, this is when I realized the struggles my mother went through to keep food on our table and a roof over our heads. This often showed me how strong my mother really was. The load to make sure my sister and I were taken care of was not easy but I believe she did the best she could, and my family pitched in when needed.
Mother-Mother or Father-Father
This is honestly pretty much like a mother-father household the only obvious difference is that it is same sex. My first experience with this was not the greatest, but you learn from experience and I believe this made me grow up and look at the world through a different lens. Although, my mother has moved on to someone new since that experience, and I have not actually lived with them considering the fact that I am now in college, I can say that I have become more accepting. I believe that I had to realize that for one I could not change my mother, or even make her into someone she wasn’t. I also realized that no matter what my mother did, or who she loved I would still love her the same.
I believe that children in any household can clearly see that there are very different dynamics to the make-up of every family and that not all families look the same as long as the parents are allowing them to be open minded.
