I was offended when one of my friends asked why I was single when I have constant messages and 'DMs,' but honestly, I’m happier right now than I’ve ever been. I replayed her question over and over as I started to understand why she asked. We live in this generation that glorifies Instagram couples as “couple goals” and in 2017, it is now acceptable to “hook-up."
Everyone is so focused on finding the one that they will settle for just anybody.
After a four year relationship, I started dating somebody new: myself. Let me just tell you, he's great. He’s taught me that it’s OK to be selfish because when will I ever have the opportunity to pack up and move 400 miles away? There will be a day when I have a spouse and possibly a family that will depend on me, but right now, I need to be making decisions based on no one but myself. These decisions have no counter-argument. I’m doing what I want when I want to, and I love it.
He taught me that there is no such things as another half. I am a whole person. The problem with people searching for their other half is that they’re claiming they’re only half a person. I don’t want half a person; I would prefer a whole one.
He taught me not to settle. I’ve spent a lot of time alone just trying to find my identity in other people. I wanted to know who liked me, who thought I was attractive, etc. The problem with this, if you haven’t identified it already, is that people are going to disappoint you. Do not let people convince you that you’re too picky, because you are the one who will be living with the consequences of a settled relationship if you do.
He taught me how to be genuinely happy and to make sure that my happiness stemmed from no one other than myself and the opportunities I’ve been given. Having somebody to add to your happiness is beautiful but don't mistake that for needing somebody to provide it because how do you expect yourself to be happy with somebody else when you can’t even make yourself happy?
He taught me that it’s alright to laugh at my own jokes and sometimes eat pie for breakfast and ice cream for dinner. He taught me that it’s okay to hike a mountain at 3 a.m. just to watch the sunrise alone. He taught me to sing in my car as if nobody was watching, because nobody is. I’m 19 and will never be younger than I am this very moment.
My life does not begin when I find somebody who loves me, it’s began when I started loving myself. But as for now, I’m way too busy falling in love with myself to even consider falling in love with you.
