Beth Ford, the CEO of Land O'Lakes, a powerhouse in the world of agriculture, spoke at an event I attended and said one statement that stayed with me far after her talk was done. Ford said in the midst of her speech, "Yeah, that didn't go so well." She was referring to one of the many opportunities the company pursued and bombed. The crazy part of the comment was that she said it without any shame. She and the company had seemingly accepted the failure, learned from it, and moved on. I was at a lack of words. Where was the blaming? The regret? The embarrassment? The eyed closed, fist clenching wishing to go back and time and do it all over?
It wasn't there.
That's because Beth Ford and many other incredible individuals understand that failure is one of the most powerful tools for learning. Ask Henry Ford, Thomas Edison, Michael Jordan, JK Rowling… this list could go on forever. Failure has important things to teach us, and if we can get on board, push back our aversion, and learn from it we can achieve far more than we thought was possible.
If you're anything like me, you know big and little fails. A quick inventory of the last year of my life leaves me remembering dropping the ball on a great relationship, missing assignments, spilling coffee on myself before a big presentation, calling someone the wrong name, and a new cheesecake masterpiece turned disaster to name a few. Did I enjoy any part, at all, of those big nosedives? Nope, not one bit. In some cases, they hurt, in others they were embarrassing, but the one thing they all did was emotionally impact me enough to create change.
And that's the magic of failing.
Change comes from your current situation being acted on by a stressor, maybe the promise of future benefits or the discomfort from the present. JK Rowling once told a story about her journey to success. Before her Harry Potter books got big, she was living in almost poverty failing in many aspects of her life. But she says that all those failures forced her to pursue what she was afraid to do. If she would have half succeed at being a banker, she never would have written those books. And look at how that turned out; Rowling brought priceless value to so many people as well as created a life she loves.
Back to my fresh failures from this past year, HOLY COW, I LEARNED A LOT! I learned about myself, about my support circle, about what not to do, and most importantly how to recover. It can be hard to accept but we are all going to go through ups and downs in life; we are all going to fall flat on our face a few times.
If somehow you are a magical human that won't, you'll have missed out on living a life full of meaningful moments. Because those special parts of life don't come for free; they come from leaving your number for the cute waiter (and chancing rejection) and applying to your dream job that you aren't qualified for. No one can escape failure. Not the amazing Beth Ford, not Gandhi, and not you. It's up to you to change those flops into lessons.
When something goes south, take a big deep breath. Then take another one. Possibly throw in one more depending on the severity of the issue. Can you fix what's broken? Minimize the damage? If so, do that; if not, think back about what went wrong. What part did you play in it? How could it be avoided in the future? Once you have some answers stuck in your brain, start the process (however long or short it may be) to forgive yourself and move on. No one is perfect, but everyone has the choice to learn and grow.
Let's get out there, give failure the finger, and give our wildest dreams a go- even if the threat of a big face plant is around. And if that face plant does come, let's use it as an opportunity to improve, and maybe chuckle at ourselves.
