An Open Letter To A Failed Friendship

An Open Letter To A Failed Friendship

Hakuna matata.
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Have you ever had a friendship so pure that you felt like Timon and Pumbaa from "The Lion King"? Has there ever been a time in your life with a friend that you knew someone had to be watching over you two, putting you together like magnets while creating Kodak moment after Kodak moment? Well, we had that, my friend. At this point, I should say, "Stranger, we had that."

For a couple of years now, I have held all the anger that I feel towards you, inside. From time to time, I find myself wondering about you, wondering if you are happy, if you found your Timon or maybe your Pumbaa. However, I am done being angry towards you. I am done holding all of this in. The best part about it is, I forgive you.

You were a great friend majority of the time. I had few complaints about you, something that if you had really paid attention to who I am, you would have realized how rare that is. There are few people that I have a few complaints about. This is not an open letter about my complaints, but rather a letter to say thanks. Thanks for being there for the things that you were there for. Regardless if you still feel as if you have to hate me, you must admit that we had a lot of fun.

This is not a pathetic plea begging you to forgive me, but this is just an attempt at being honest. I highly doubt that you or anyone you really know will read this. If and when someone does read this, they will probably think this is about them without any regard to you or your feelings. This is also not an attempt to say sorry for being the friend that I am or for not being the friend that I could be. It's just time to let you know where I'm at.

Since our friendship ended, I have found people who love me. These people are quite possibly the best people I am ever going to meet in life. They are so inspirational and admirable in every single way imaginable. For the record, at one point in our short friendship together, you were in the same boat with them. I use to want to be just like you. Now, I have realized that I am who I am and that will not change. Surprisingly, when I quit being around you, I started to notice that I like who I am and that other people like who I am too.

I hope you have a wonderful life. If one day, you decide that you don't absolutely hate me, I will be here to talk. That, of course, would mean that you would have to admit, that it wasn't just my fault our friendship ended and I am not sure if you are capable of that. However, in the event that there is no one to talk to, I will be here because I know the person that you were, and the person that you can be.

A friend recently told me you were married and are expecting a baby in a few short months. While I may not be telling you in person, congratulations. I sincerely mean that. Being a mom is one of the best things that will ever happen to you. I hope that you enjoy it as much as I do. You'll be great, children has always been your calling.

I also hope that in a few years, you can see a little bit of us in your children. If you have a daughter, I hope that her best friend reminds you of me. Regardless of how our friendship ended, regardless of how short it seemed, you were honestly one of the most wonderful people I could have ever met. You, unintentionally, taught me two of the greatest life lessons ever. I would have never learned them if I hadn't lost you as a friend.

First, perfect things will never last. I mean, even Vada had to say bye to Thomas J. That was the saddest movie to watch, but going through losing you as a friend, and still knowing you were going about life, was hard. I still think about you from time to time, and I honestly wish you nothing but the best.

The second life lesson is a little more valuable than the first. It's to never take things for granted, especially people. If anyone would have told me ten years ago, that our friendship would be over before we even graduated high school, I would have said they were crazy. You meant more to me than you will ever know. Maybe we could be friends later on in life, but until then, hakuna matata.

Cover Image Credit: Kayla Davis

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It's Time To Thank Your First Roommate

Not the horror story kind of roommate, but the one that was truly awesome.
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Nostalgic feelings have recently caused me to reflect back on my freshman year of college. No other year of my life has been filled with more ups and downs, and highs and lows, than freshman year. Throughout all of the madness, one factor remained constant: my roommate. It is time to thank her for everything. These are only a few of the many reasons to do so, and this goes for roommates everywhere.

You have been through all the college "firsts" together.

If you think about it, your roommate was there through all of your first college experiences. The first day of orientation, wishing you luck on the first days of classes, the first night out, etc. That is something that can never be changed. You will always look back and think, "I remember my first day of college with ____."

You were even each other's first real college friend.

You were even each other's first real college friend.

Months before move-in day, you were already planning out what freshman year would be like. Whether you previously knew each other, met on Facebook, or arranged to meet in person before making any decisions, you made your first real college friend during that process.

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The transition from high school to college is not easy, but somehow you made it out on the other side.

It is no secret that transitioning from high school to college is difficult. No matter how excited you were to get away from home, reality hit at some point. Although some people are better at adjusting than others, at the times when you were not, your roommate was there to listen. You helped each other out, and made it through together.

Late night talks were never more real.

Remember the first week when we stayed up talking until 2:00 a.m. every night? Late night talks will never be more real than they were freshman year. There was so much to plan for, figure out, and hope for. Your roommate talked, listened, laughed, and cried right there with you until one of you stopped responding because sleep took over.

You saw each other at your absolute lowest.

It was difficult being away from home. It hurt watching relationships end and losing touch with your hometown friends. It was stressful trying to get in the swing of college level classes. Despite all of the above, your roommate saw, listened, and strengthened you.

...but you also saw each other during your highest highs.

After seeing each other during the lows, seeing each other during the highs was such a great feeling. Getting involved on campus, making new friends, and succeeding in classes are only a few of the many ways you have watched each other grow.

There was so much time to bond before the stresses of college would later take over.

Freshman year was not "easy," but looking back on it, it was more manageable than you thought at the time. College only gets busier the more the years go on, which means less free time. Freshman year you went to lunch, dinner, the gym, class, events, and everything else possible together. You had the chance to be each other's go-to before it got tough.

No matter what, you always bounced back to being inseparable.

Phases of not talking or seeing each other because of business and stress would come and go. Even though you physically grew apart, you did not grow apart as friends. When one of you was in a funk, as soon as it was over, you bounced right back. You and your freshman roommate were inseparable.

The "remember that one time, freshman year..." stories never end.

Looking back on freshman year together is one of my favorite times. There are so many stories you have made, which at the time seemed so small, that bring the biggest laughs today. You will always have those stories to share together.

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The unspoken rule that no matter how far apart you grow, you are always there for each other.

It is sad to look back and realize everything that has changed since your freshman year days. You started college with a clean slate, and all you really had was each other. Even though you went separate ways, there is an unspoken rule that you are still always there for each other.

Your old dorm room is now filled with two freshmen trying to make it through their first year. They will never know all the memories that you made in that room, and how it used to be your home. You can only hope that they will have the relationship you had together to reflect on in the years to come.


Cover Image Credit: Katie Ward

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