I have never considered myself to be a confident person. I am undoubtedly extroverted and outgoing, but confident is never a trait I’ve thought applied to me. However, this past week, two of my friends separately asked me how I acquired so much confidence. I looked at them bewildered, like a deer in headlights, confused why they thought I possessed confidence. Each gave me their reasoning. One of them described my posture and the way I carried myself as an indicator for self-confidence. The other mentioned my “confidence” after running into some acquaintances at an off-campus eatery and inviting them to come join us at our table.

Normally, I wouldn’t think anything of either of these comments, but they resonated with me, because I have never considered myself to be confident. I have always envied those who were so self-assured in their abilities.

As I discussed with one of my friends all the reasons I believed I was not confident, she explained the difference between self-confidence and social confidence. I had never even realized there were different types of confidence until this point. I had never believed I was confident, because I always assumed that confidence was limited to self-confidence.

While I have little self-confidence, my extroverted nature has equipped me with social confidence. I am perfectly comfortable striking up a conversation with a stranger but constantly second guess the choices I make about trivial matters.

My lack of self-confidence is the exact reason why I never considered myself to be confident until others told me I was. Confidence takes so many different forms and can have extremely negative connotations. Perhaps this is why I steered clear of the word for so many years, but I now realize not all confidence is alike. The confidence I have manifests itself very differently from the next person. Confidence does not equate to narcissism, as I once believed, but rather being self-assured, which is why I am no longer afraid to be considered a confident individual.