Fifty percent of all marriages end in divorce, so I can never figure out what the rush is to tie the knot. I consider myself an optimist in most cases, but with marriage, I have a more pessimistic view. Marriage is slowly becoming an undermined institution. We are seeing a recent increase in young marriages that inevitably lead to a higher percentage of divorces.
I can understand the pressure one feels to put a ring on it after dating someone for a certain amount of years and having to propose soon. What I do not understand is how someone in their early 20s can feel ready for marriage. That is a commitment that should not be having to be made at 21.
You are probably thinking about marriages from back in the day when people would tie the knot at 18. Thousands of those couples are your parents now or your grandparents who are still living a happy life together, but times have changed. They have changed a lot. In those days, opportunities for women were scarce, so a woman’s life goal was, by and large, to be a good wife and have children.
I am by no means saying that if you are married, you cannot reach your career goals as a women. There is so much more to this argument than women being constrained to their husband. It is about the value of marriage as an institution and how much disrespect it has been receiving lately.
Being in a steady relationship has made me think of marriage. The thought has crossed my mind in a different way than it may for many others. Honestly, it has made me sure that, both my boyfriend and I, are absolutely not ready for marriage. That is not to say that we are not happy or care about each other. We are just not at that point in our lives.
My views stem from my parents. They educate us and discipline us to become great. A lot of their views become yours because that is how you were raised. My father was 30 and my mother was 28 when they married. That is partly why I believe waiting to be more mature and stable is important before thinking of marriage.
Bear with me. I am not trying to generalize because I am sure there are couples out there very much in love who really want to get married because in their minds they have never been more sure about anything.
All I want is for people to realize that getting married is not a joke. It is not something you can just go back on because you are not happy anymore. This is why you need to be stable and ready. Of course, all things can fail because nothing is perfect, but the more mature and stable you are, the less chance of it failing.
Call me a pessimist or closed-minded, but what is the point of getting married so young if you are not going to take it seriously or if you know it has a higher probability of failing? In my mind, I just do not see the hurry to bind yourself to someone for what is supposed to be forever.
