Everyone Loves You Once Your Boobs Get Bigger

Everyone Loves You Once Your Boobs Get Bigger

Big boobs... Confidence... They’re kind of related — but only one for sure can get people to like you.
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I'm in South Africa.

Yes, right now as I'm typing this.

I could go on and on about the beauty of the country, how fresh the air is, how hospitable the people are, or how the effects of apartheid remain heavily influential on the social and economic conditions within certain communities. But that's an article for another day.

This article is about my breasts.

Or, more accurately, what occurred because of my breasts.

I've been blessed to study abroad (it’s actually more like a mission trip, but whatever) with 16 really cool students in my honors seminar class. We've been taking flight after flight, bus drive after bus drive, and experiencing tons of things we can cross off of our bucket lists. I'm having tons of fun... now.

As in literally just today. And it's all because of my breasts.

OK, I'm exaggerating. But there's a reason for my theatrics.

Throughout the whole trip ("whole" is a pretty loose term considering we've only been here for five days) I’ve felt more or less like an outsider. My classmates and I have been stuck together for basically 24 hours of the day, but I haven’t felt like I’ve been there. I’ve been feeling like I’m invading a secret club, or seventeen-wheeling a huge friend group.

Yeah, I talk to most of them, but they’ve mostly responded with one-liners. Or, if I did have a really good conversation, it’s only been with one person at a time — usually when they’re forced to talk to me because no one else is around.

They gravitate towards one another, always laughing and sharing inside jokes. The conversation flows smoothly and freely like the dozens of rivers we’ve driven by. They huddle up near each other when we stop for breaks (and if they’re near me they’ve always conveniently found a reason to stand somewhere else) and don’t choose to sit next to me if there are other seats available.

I started wondering what I was doing wrong. Am I boring? Do I sound stupid? Am I annoying? Do I smell?

Every day I felt less and less included in everything we did — hell, even my professor only spoke to me thirty seconds at a time. I knew there had to be something about me that was different from everyone else, but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out what it was. I talked pretty frequently (for an introvert, once every twenty minutes is frequent, okay) and tried to learn more about them, but I couldn’t sever that imaginary wall between me and them.

And then came the black bra.

I pulled it out of my suitcase without thinking, just throwing something on since we’d be walking around all day and I couldn’t care less to look cute. As I looked in the mirror to do my hair, I noticed there was a very noticeable lift to my assets. And with that lift came a lift in my spirits.

I took tons of pictures today and ran my mouth like it had diarrhea. I laughed more, said whatever came to mind and participated in every activity instead of usually standing on the sidelines.

I had fun. And even though every experience has been enjoyable so far, today I finally felt like I was studying with my class and not observing.

And surprisingly, I didn’t feel like an outsider. I finally got to join in on those conversations — some of them actually came up and talked to me first. I wasn’t forced to awkwardly stand in the corner pretending to be on my phone even though there’s no service.

It was a great day. And after settling into my hotel room for the night, I pondered the sudden change in everyone’s attitude towards me. As I passed the mirror I thought to myself, “it must’ve been the boobs.”

And then like a half second later, “Oh my god, was it really the boobs?”

Of course, it wasn’t the freaking boobs. I’m still a B cup. It was my confidence.

Confidence is one of those things we all need but pretty much no one has (like common sense). This whole trip I’ve been second-guessing myself, terrified of saying something stupid or doing something embarrassing. I’ve been dwelling on the fact that I’m not a member of the group so much so that I’ve never tried to be a member of the dang group.

A lot of us are afraid to put ourselves out there, especially with people we don’t know that well. We’re scared of being ourselves because we think people might not like who that person is. None of my classmates found it interesting to talk to me because I was subconsciously closing myself off from them (and I have resting bitch face which doesn’t help). I felt comfort in being out of place because I was scared to be in place. I was scared to open up and show who I really am.

It’s a struggle that I know many of us face, especially those who are already naturally shy. Pair that with insecurity and you have a person with like three friends, who everyone thinks is either very weird or a stuck-up snob who doesn’t like to socialize.

All my life I’ve been doing this — and it’s taken a black push-up bra to alert me to this fact. Today I’ve decided to be the push-up bra for all of you facing the same issue. Sometimes people actually are annoying, boring, stupid, or smelly, and that’s why they have a hard time making friends. But sometimes we do it to ourselves because we’re so uncomfortable with ourselves that we think everyone else will be.

As we step into the new year, let’s all make a vow to leave our insecurities and doubts behind. Let’s vow to be ourselves freely at all times and fearless of saying, doing, and thinking whatever we want, whenever we want.

And let’s never forget to leave the house without our push-up bras.

Cover Image Credit: Nijer Reaves

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75 Of The Most Iconic Vine Quotes

"I smell like beef"

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Vine may be dead but Vine references live on. I still watch Vine threads AT LEAST twice a day. Here are 75 of the most quotable vines:

1. "Ooooooo, he needs some milk."

2. "Hi, welcome to Chili's."

3. "It is Wednesday, my dudes."

4. "Country boy, I love you ahhhwweelhwh..."

5. "Escalera oooooooaaaa!"

6. "F**k ya chicken strips!"

7. "Barbecue sauce on my titties."

8. "Gimme your F**KING money!"

9. "That was legitness."

10. "Ms. Keisha, MS. KEISHA! Oh my f**king God, she f**king dead."

11. "Fre-sha-vocado."

12. "Staaaahp! I coulda dropped my croissant!"

13. "That's my OPINION."

14. "You're not my dad, ugly ass f**king noodle head."

15. "What the f**k, Richard."

16. "This bitch empty, YEET!"

17. "Road work ahead? Yeah, I sure hope it does."

18. "What up, I'm Jared I'm 19, and I never f**king learned how to read."

19. "Um, I'm never been to oovoo javer."

20. "My God, they were roommates."

21. "Why are you running, why are you running?"

22. "Whoever threw that paper, your mom's a hoe."

23. "I can't swim."

24. "Lebron James."

25. "It's an avocado, thanksssss..."

26. "Mother trucker dude, that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick."

27. "Watch your profanity."

28. "I love you bitch, I ain't never gonna stop loving you, biiiiiitch."

29. "What are thoooooose?"

30. "I smell like beef."

31. "You better stop."

32. "What the F**K IS UP KYLE?"

33. "Come get y'all juice."

34. "Two bros, chilling in a hot tub, 5 feet apart cause they're not gay."

35. "So you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday to my birthday party on my birthday with a birthday gift?"

36. "I wanna be a cowboy, baby."

37. "Why you always lying?"

38. "Nice Ron" "I sneezed, oh, what, am I not allowed to sneeze?"

39. "I'm washing me and my clothes."

40. "Honey, you've got a big storm coming."

41. "XOXO, gossip girl."

42. "Shoutout to all the pear."

43. "A potato flew around my room before you came."

44. "Chipotle is my life."

45. "Look at all those chickens!"

46. "YOU BETTER STOP."

47. "I like turtles."

48. "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life, watermelon, INSIDE A WATERMELON."

49. "Deez nuts, HA GOT EM?"

50. "F**k you, I don't want no ravioli."

51. "21."

52. "I'm in my mum's car, broom broom."

53. "Iridocyclitis."

54. "You know what, I'm about to say it."

55. "That is NOT correct."

56. "Uh, I'm not finished" "Oh my God, can you let me do what I need to do?"

57. "I have osteoporosis."

58. "ADAM."

59. "Merry Chrysler."

60. "Wait a minute, who ARE you?"

61. "Try me, bitch."

62. "When will you learn, THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?"

63. "I didn't get no sleep cause of y'all, y'all not gone get no sleep cause of me!"

64. "Do you want to go see Uncle Cracker or no?"

65. "So no head?"

66. "You got eczema."

67. "I am shooketh."

68. "Hey my name is Trey, I have a basketball game tomorrow."

69. "Can I PLEASE get a waffle?"

70. "There is only one thing worse than a rapist." "A child."

71. "Ah f**k, I can't believe you've done this."

72. "Bitch, I hope the f**k you do."

73. "Two shots of vodka."

74. "F**k off Janet, I'm not going to your f**king baby shower."

75. "JEEEEEZ, Jesus Christ."

Cover Image Credit:

Vine/Katie Ryan

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Making a Decision: an Indecisive Guide

To all the indecisive people out there: you are not alone

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I am the queen of indecision. For me, making a choice will have me frantically calling both of my parents, asking all of my friends' advice and postponing all studying until the decision is made. Of course, this is because I do not want to make a choice that I regret – such as the time I decided that starting my job at 6:30 am would be a good idea, or the time when I scared my friends with how hyper I was after drinking both coffee and Boba tea. Yet when I take this caution of making the wrong choice too far, the decision-making process itself ends up being regrettable. So much so that I called my mom approximately seven times this weekend to ask her advice on a decision. So much so that my brother used an example of me not being able to choose what kind of shoe I should wear in his article.

This weekend, I was presented with two amazing opportunities to make a difference in the world this summer and I entered a stage of decision paralysis that I did not know was possible. No matter which angle I looked at each situation from, they both would provide me with a phenomenal experience, and would both require sacrifices. Despite not (as of yet) reaching a concrete decision, I learned a lot about the decision-making process and what to do in the next time I am faced with a difficult choice. So, in the spirit of finding summer jobs, gearing up to register for classes and deciding what on earth we want to do with our futures, here are the tips and tricks that I would follow to make the best decision that you can.

Don't overthink it.

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Really, this goes without thinking! Or, unlike most of us, it goes with a LOT of thinking! Seriously though, if you overthink things, they will turn into a pudding mush in your brain until you don't know what you don't know anymore. There is a very fine line between thinking through all your options and overthinking them – and judging by the number of times I called my mom this weekend, definitely crossed it.

Always use the pro-con list

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Ah, the Gilmore Girls. Not only did you inspire me to read every single book under the sun or have a witty conversation full of cultural references no one else understands, but you also taught me the beauty of the pro-con list. Choosing what you want can be messy and difficult to find because of the fears you might have. distinguish from the fears. Writing it all down on paper can often illuminate the right decision and show you which path is ultimately better.

Decide on your make-or-break factor

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Sometimes even the best pro-and-con lists will not be enough and will leave you in a frantic analysis ("should I go for the decision with 3 cons or 3.5 cons?") When even the Gilmore method fails, fear not! Consider which factors you truly do not want to compromise on and go from there. This can mean that even the worse decision may be the right one for you.

Trust your gut

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As much as it is difficult to dig through your feelings to find your true motives behind a decision, your gut can sometimes tell you what you are most passionate about and therefore what decision is best for you to take. As my Emory Reads friends tell me, passion trumps everything. Choosing which decision aligns with your values will often lead you to make the best and most-satisfying decision.

But trust your head as well

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But your gut can't always be trusted. It can lie to you, and when you overthink too much, it can change its mind. Your gut feeling may be one that is furthermore borne out of fear of the other option. In that way, I have made many a good decision based on the pure basis of rationality. Using only our heart to make important decisions allows fear to be one of the factors, whereas looking at the decision rationally can help you see the ultimate path.

Ask around

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When I am puzzled about making a risky decision, I often consult the people in my life who are on my side and want the best for me. These people can help you gauge what your heart truly desires, bring up factors that you haven't considered and even act as a support network for you while making this decision. When your mind kicks into over-analysis, sometimes a fresh perspective is all you need to truly make a confident choice. Decisions are hard, people. Don't make them on your own.=

Don't ask everyone

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There is such a thing as consulting others to make an important decision, and there is such a thing as relying on them to make your decision. If you ask too many people from too wide a pool, you'll end up having opinions for and against what you are proposing, which means that someone will always be disappointed in your decision. The bottom line is, asking too many people for their opinions is frustrating, no matter what – whether they have contradicting opinions, or they just nod their heads and go "hmmm, tough choice" (thanks, I guess?). In order to avoid frustration, consult the people in your life who know you the best and are dearest to you, rather than the stranger in front of you in line for fries at the DUC.

"Would my dad be proud?"

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Or your granddad, or your mom, or your professor, or even a TV character. Whoever you know whose morals you can measure your decision up to will often provide reason and illumination. If the decision you are making is not too wild and you feel that you will have their approval, then it is likely not detrimental.

Stick with your decision!

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Resolutely make up your mind and refuse to turn back. Exercise your right as a free individual to make a choice for yourself, and then do not second-guess it. Please don't do what I did and email a company two days later saying you've changed your mind. Please.

There is not always a right decision

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Sometimes both decisions you are presented with have different but equally good opportunities. In that case, lucky you! You have two amazing opportunities and therefore cannot mess up. Rather than stressing that you are picking the wrong choice, know that you cannot go wrong in either.

Realize you will grow no matter what

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Decision-making should be viewed as a challenge and a privilege rather than a burden. Make big, bold and beautiful decisions. Making up your mind can lead to a phenomenal experience that you will adore or a difficult experience that will only fashion you into a better person. Positive consequences can come out of any decision, even if we land in an upsetting position. Each choice we make can positively contribute to our character, fashioning us into the person we are becoming, day by day.


By the time this article is published, I will know my decision. And hopefully, by the end of this article, you will know yours. Let's continue to make decisions courageously, following both our heads and our hearts. Let's be determined to grow through our decisions, realizing that we have made the best choice we could, and never looking back.

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