Emotions are hard. Some people can’t express theirs, bottling them up, trusting no one - probably not even themselves - with the years upon years’ worth of thoughts stuffed within the depths of the self. Other people are well-balanced, so you might say. They are a good mix of vulnerable and guarded, of crazy and serious, of joy and mellow. They can light up a room or calm down a tense mood. Yet still others are all over the place, with mood swings that seem out of control, going from extremely happy to utterly depressed, or perhaps lesser versions of these. People who are overtly emotive feel deeply, whether that be anger, sadness, elation, confusion, etc. They are emphatic maybe even to a fault, putting others’ feelings on themselves and feeling even more deeply, if that’s a thing.
Emotions are hard. I definitely fit into the overly-emotional category. I am a feeler. I long for depth and meaning in my relationships around me. Small talk is difficult for me and I find myself really overwhelmed with the need to touch base with everyone in large group settings and make them feel included, but inevitably I fail at that, and retreat into myself, half-heartedly giving nods or allowing myself to become distracted during conversations.
Emotions are hard. I worry a lot. Mostly about stupid stuff, like whether someone thinks I’m good enough, or that I’m sick because I sneezed twice in a row, or that I’m going to fall asleep in class so I better take a nap before that and all hell breaks loose if I don’t. But I also worry about bigger things. Things I don’t like others to know I worry about. Things that seem like too much or that I think would seem ridiculous to most people. These things I entrust to a few people, and it is hard to move past the worry.
Emotions are hard. I get worked up easily. If something doesn’t go my way or isn’t best for me, then I avoid it or get mad. I ruin the mood and I can’t seem to get out of my moping. I want to be paid attention to, and I want to be desired. I hate feeling left out. I let those circumstances or situations bring me to a place of anxiety or not feeling good enough.
Emotions are hard. I cry all the time. I go through waves of not being able to cry which is entirely frustrating, and I go through periods where my eyes are extra wet even more than they are dry. Sometimes I’m hurting so much on the inside and cannot cry out loud at all.
Emotions are hard. I get giddy and laugh so hard no one can understand what I am trying to say. I scream and am super loud and annoy people with my ecstatic happiness. I smile and snort, even though on the inside I might be stifling sobs.
Emotions are hard. I feel lonely and sad. I feel like I’m too much and/or not good enough. I feel like I’m a burden, or if I actually figure out what I’m feeling, that it will be misunderstood and I will be judged for feeling a certain way.
Emotions are SO hard.
Sometimes they are 100% unbearable. Emotions make people do crazy things. They make a guy blurt out how much he loves his girl best friend. They make a mama burst into tears as she is overwhelmed with pain and joy for her newborn child. They make a child scream in anguish when her hair is pulled by the school bully. They cause strife, bitterness, jealousy, intensity, empathy, delight, bliss, and euphoria. Emotions can rule our lives if we aren’t careful. We must be cautious and attempt to balance them.
It is important to let truth and facts take precedence over solely following our emotions. It’s okay to have a lot going on and to not know how to deal with it all. But we must find healthy outlets to process. Personally, I’ve found faith in God, listening to music and sitting quietly outside all to be safe havens for me when I feel entirely overwhelmed by emotion or don’t know how to process what I’m feeling. Sometimes just talking and being heard helps, and other times I just need a solid, long hug.
Emotions are hard. I would know. But I bet you likewise would know, or at least agree with me. So make sure to take time for yourself this week, and find some outlet to be able to find rest. It’s important to allow time and margin in our day to process our emotions healthily. So talk to someone, do something you love, and care for your emotions -- don’t let them rule you.
