I don't know about you guys, but I watch a lot of HGTV. I am obsessed with those home renovation shows where they take some junky kitchen with a 1970's decor and turn it into the kitchen dreams and morning talk show television sets are made of. Not only do these people get a beautiful all-white kitchen and marble countertops, but they get some pretty dreamy appliances too.
All of this binge-watching inspired me to curate a list of some of the dream appliances we'd all love to have, but will probably never use.
1. The KitchenAid Mixer
This one is definitely an ease into the list and arguably the most practical. I have coveted this kitchen item since my mom first got one when I was in middle-school. Let's be honest, I'm not a professional baker. I don't need this, but damn if it isn't the cutest mixing bowl I've ever seen. Plus it isn't too bad on the price; $250 is reasonable, right honey?
2. The Samsung Smart Fridge
Okay, so I definitely don't need a TV in my fridge. And I definitely don't need a $4,000 fridge. But have you seen the fucking commercial for this thing? You probably haven't if you don't watch as much HGTV as I do, but still. LOOK AT THIS THING. It can tell you how many eggs you have left and how old they are, and you've just been here asking your S.O. that pressing question. Fool.
3. The Professional's Carbonation Fountain
Professional's Carbonation Fountain
What's that you say Sheila? You only like soda from a fountain? Well say no more you entitled bitch. For a measly $200 you can buy this carbonation fountain and never suffer the perils of bottled soda ever again. La Croix who? Oh Sheila, you really are my least favorite friend. But seriously; odds are I would buy this, use it once, forget to clean it, and then deem it trash 6 months later. And yet, I still really want one.
4. The Viking Dual Range
If you thought I was being extra with the fridge, well you should just click away now, because shit just got real. The Viking Dual Range, which honestly no one other than an actual chef should ever need, sells for a whopping $20K. And obviously, we all want one. Think of all of the sides we could make with those burners. We're obviously doing Thanksgiving at my house fam.
5. Mugnaini Wood-Fired Pizza Oven
Mugnaini Wood-Fired Pizza Oven
You know the age-old argument that stems from the dreaded question "What's for dinner babe?" Don't you just wish you could grab your lover tight and offer to jet them through the night to Naples for authentic Neapolitan pizza paired with a red wine and candlelight? Yeah, well that sounds really expensive. I thought we were saving for a house?! Goddamnit Brad this will never work! Well instead, imagine you could sublet that experience multiple times a month in your own kitchen...for a cool $9,000. I'm game.
Odds are I will never be rich enough to have all of these appliances. Or I'll grow up enough in the time between now and when I am rich enough to make better purchasing decisions. Only time will tell. Until then, let me know what you'd want to see in your dream kitchen!
