Your knight in shining metallic paint.
The first time I explained to my mom what exactly a driver was she almost had a heart attack. The thought of her baby girl being picked up in a dimly lit parking lot by a random stranger and then whisked away to a party of an undisclosed location was a bit overwhelming for her. At first the whole process does seem a little sketchy. I mean I’m no fool, I’ve watched 20/20 before and am completely aware of “Stranger Danger.”
But after a few weeks in college a girl soon realizes that a driver is actually a knight in shining metallic paint. Let’s face it, girls are going to go to parties come hell or high water, and without drivers girls would be without reliable, and most importantly, sober rides. These rides are truly lifesavers, but in order to use them, there are certain rules every good college girl must know. Follow all of these rules, and you’ll be sure to make it to the party as safely as possible.
Rule #1: Be Polite- You weren’t raised in a barn. Or maybe you were, this is Kentucky. Regardless of that fact, use your manners. Don’t completely ignore the driver once you get in the car. Strike up a conversation with him, he’s doing you a huge favor, the least you could do is be nice. And who knows he could be a really cool guy, who you will probably run into sometime during the rest of your college career. Also don’t be obnoxious, there’s nothing worse than a 3x4 enclosed space filled with screaming girls, save it for the party.
Rule #2: Call At A Reasonable Time- If you call a driver any later than 11:30 p.m. don’t get your panties in a wad If he says he’s, “super backed up,” puts you the notorious “list,” or asks you to call someone else. That’s your own fault, sugar. This is now the time to call the other drivers/ your roommate that’s, “too tired to go out” to take you. Best of luck.
Rule #3: After The Party DO NOT Ask Your Driver To Take You To Taco Bell- You might think you deserve a baja blast with all the calories you burned dancing your night away, but you don’t. He’s got tons of other girls to take home, the last thing he needs is you trying to drunk order a Crunch Wrap Supreme from the backseat. Take your shambly self back to your room and eat that ramen that you’ve been avoiding for the past month. There are ways around this rule however. You may ask the driver for food if and only if you are the best of buds with him or if it is the end of his shift.
Rule #4 Say Thank You- This one is pretty self-explanatory.
As girls, it’s easy for us to get frustrated with drivers on nights when “I’ll be there in 15,” somehow turns into a 45 minute wait. But take a deep and remember to cut them some slack. They’re doing the best they can and were lucky to have them. Girls at other schools usually walk to parties or have to pay for a taxi, so we should actually consider ourselves pretty lucky. So the next time you decide to call a driver remember to put on a smile and start to dial, after all your knight and shining metallic paint is only a phone call away.
