I grew up in a family with strong, beautiful and independent women. The women in my life knew who they were and knew that their value didn’t come from the recognition of a man. The men in their lives did not define them

My mom has repeatedly told me I don’t need a man to define who I am. I didn’t get that until one shattered me into pieces. For a year I was left picking up broken pieces of myself. In the process of gluing myself back together I got what she had been telling me for years.

I don’t need a man.

I am perfectly fine on my own. I live for the idea that each day will present me with new opportunities. I love that at any given moment my life could change for the better. I know that I am someone who can stand on my own. I go after adventure. I go after I want because I want a life filled with passion. I am strong, witty, beautiful and smart. I did not need a man to tell me any of that.

If I’m so sure I don’t need a man why be with one? Honestly I wouldn’t be if I didn’t feel like whomever I was with was worth it. I don’t need to waste my time on someone who doesn’t push me to be better or excite me.

So I don’t need you. I know I’ll be okay if you leave. But I don’t want you to because I want you. I want to feel your arms around me when I sleep because when you hold me I sleep easier. I want to kiss your lips because they feel so sweet against mine. I want to tell you my good news because you listen to me when I talk.

I want to hold you because you’re supposed to keep close the things that are important to you. I want you to tell me about your life because I’m interested in what you have to say. I want to lie in bed and talk about books and music and art because you get that those are important. I want to eat your grandpa’s famous dishes. I want to see you succeed.

I want you because you excite me. I want to excite you. I want us to push each other to better. You don’t have to call me everyday, or text me all the time. I don’t need that. I need air and food and my parents to keep paying my insurance.

I don’t need you and I know you don’t need me either. But I want you. I’m pulled to you in a way that doesn’t make sense but at the same time is the only thing that I understand.

We let each other be who we are. No one tries to change the other. We give each space but we’re there for each other too. I want that. I want you. I want to know that we’ve got each other.

So you don’t have to need me. I’m not sure I want you to, just want me. Crave my kiss like I crave yours. Be interested in my thoughts like I am yours. Listen to me when I speak like I listen to you. Want me. Want me because it means you’ve made a choice to be with me. Don’t need me. Needing me needs you feel obligated to be with me.

I have no obligation to be with you. I have a desire to be with you. I want you. I’m just here hoping you understand and, that you want me too.