Taking a risk is often intimidating. The act of explaining how you really feel about something or someone leaves you vulnerable. Personally I hate that feeling. I don’t like giving people the power to hurt me or putting someone in the position to criticize me. I believe this will always be somewhat uncomfortable, but as I’ve grown up I’m beginning to realize how big of a mistake it is to keep your feelings hidden or even worse lie about them. The idea that people should be able to assume what you are thinking or feeling although ideal is unrealistic. It is unfair to expect someone knows how you feel about them.
I don’t just mean feelings towards someone you like/love/date/ etc. but also your own feelings about the world around you or how people treat you. You may think not standing up for your thoughts is easier but in reality the sooner you start standing up for yourself the better. I constantly find myself holding in my true emotions in order to keep others happy. I never want anyone to think I am mean, or bossy, but now I feel like I constantly have my feelings ignored. I always thought that being nice would be enough for me to gain the appreciation of others but I think you have to find the middle ground between being a kind and open minded person, while also respecting yourself enough to demand respect from others.
It is also important to make sure people know you care about them. Thank people, be there to support them, and spend time with them during the good times and the bad. This goes along with the idea of telling people how you feel because it is often easy to think of how thankful you are for someone without telling them. It feels great to be appreciated so it's important to surround yourself with people who appreciate you but also that you make the people in your life feel like they mean a lot to you. I wish this was something people did more because I know it is reassuring for me when people tell me that I am important to them so I am trying to work on.
This is a topic I can’t give much advice on because I constantly avoid conflict, rejection and explaining how I truly feel. I do know though, from experience, that the longer you wait to stand up for yourself the more likely people are to get offended by it once you do. I also know that if you don’t act on the way you feel fast enough, it may be too late. It feels better to try and it not work out than to regret the fact that you never had the courage to go after something you wanted.
