I don't know what I want to do when I graduate college, but I think that's okay. I don't even know what I am going to do for my masters; I don't even know what if I am going to strive for a doctorate, but somehow, I think that's okay too.
Sometimes I get scared. Sometimes I get scared because I sit in class surrounded by kids that know what they want to do. Some want to be teachers, some want to be journalists, some want to go to medical school. Then there is me and I have no idea what I'm going to do.
It's not that I don't know what I want to do with my life. I have a couple ideas. I want to be a writer. I want to write novels or poetry and become nationally acclaimed. I want to write for an internet media outlet like Odyssey for the rest of my life. I want to get higher up into Odyssey. However, I also want to teach. I want to teach high school or college students, either in my hometown, or Hawaii, or wherever life happens to take me. I just want to do what I love.
However, this is where my problem arises. I want to do what I love but I could find love in all of these things. If I write novels or poetry, I can feed into the deepest fantasies of people and I could allow them to escape and partake in my own secret worlds. If I write for internet media outlets like Odyssey for the rest of my life, I can share uplifting and true pieces of media to reach everyone and anyone. If I were to get higher up in Odyssey, I could help coach and excite new EIC's and their creators just like my Managing Editor has done for me. If I were to teach high school, I could mold the minds of our future and influence them the same ways my high school teachers influenced me. If I were to teach college, I could ignite a flame inside the minds of these students and watch them as they pursue what they love. I could find love and success in many ways with each of these careers, and that's what makes it hard.
Due to being able to find success and love in each of these careers makes the decision hard. Which career do I choose? Is there a way to do them all? Will I be proud of the decision I make? Will I regret not being able to accomplish them all?
Yes, it's scary that I cannot make up my mind. Yes, I'm afraid that I may never be able to choose. Yes, I am afraid that some of these dreams may be unattainable. Yes, I'm afraid because in college you seem to be expected to know what you want to do with life... but I think I'm going to be okay. I may not have everything in my life figured out right now and I may never, but I know whatever I choose, I'm going to love it.
You may be sitting in your high school classroom scared because you're not sure what you want to do with your life, or you could be in college just like me. However, I'm here to tell you that it is okay. It's okay to not have everything planned out just yet. It's okay to not know what you're going to do with your diploma or degree. It's all going to be okay.
Life never goes as planned, at least that's what they say. Life throws you curve balls and sometimes they are exactly what you need, others not so much. Life can work in mysterious ways. So, you and I may not have everything figured out just yet, and maybe one day we never will, but we'll be okay. Some way, somehow, we will be okay. We'll find something to do, something to love doing, eventually. It may not be what we originally planned to be what we wanted, but we'll be okay. We'll be okay.
