Don't Give Up Your Dreams For A Guy, It Isn't Worth It

Don't Give Up Your Dreams For A Guy, It's Not Going To Be Worth It

You deserve a guy who pushes you to reach your goals.

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When you first get into a relationship it is all happy and sweet. Then you get into a routine and you get comfortable. Sometimes you might get too comfortable and push down your significant other. Which, obviously, isn't a good thing.

I spent two years with a guy who told me he didn't like that I went to college and didn't deny when I said he didn't support me. He didn't care. He didn't like where I was and he was going to make sure I knew it. I wasn't blameless though, I tried to get him to change his life plans to better fit mine and I told him how his passions sometimes scared me because I felt he would be too selfish. We were trying to fix a doomed relationship.

I should have ended it way before it actually ended, but I didn't. I stayed until he broke my heart and cried for weeks over him. I still do sometimes.

Don't do what I did.

Find a guy who will support you no matter what. Find a guy who, even if what you want doesn't align with what he wants, will still respect you for being confident in knowing what you want. Who supports your passions and pushes you to reach your goals.

Don't do what I did.

Find a guy who will make you happy and excited to do things and pursue your passions.

Ultimately, my wanting to go abroad ended my relationship. The sad thing is I actually thought about giving up that opportunity just in the hopes that we would work it out.

Looking back, I gave up a lot for my relationship. I didn't go to events in order to stay in and talk to him. I didn't take opportunities for my academics because it would mean less time talking to him. My first year and a half of college were spent tiptoeing around a doomed relationship and my college life suffered for it.

A relationship isn't supposed to be a struggle for who gets to do what they want. It should be about compromise and support and love. Not tearing each other down and getting angry at the other's success.

Be confident and know who you are without another person. Don't lose sight of your dreams because someone else doesn't like them. You are your own person. You deserve any life you work for. Don't give up and follow those goals you set up for yourself.

If you won't fight for your dreams, then who will?

Go out and get it, girl.

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Being Ugly

What it means to me

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Due to a series of ongoing events throughout my semester, I've reconsidered what it means for someone to truly be ugly. Though it is often used in terms of appearance, I do not see it as such-- now more than ever. Ugliness runs deeper than appearance-- it runs within one's soul and festers into other areas of one's life, particularly in their treatment of others.

I view ugliness as someone's conscious capacity and implementation of malice. Taking time and energy out of your day to hurt someone else, that's what I view as ugly. Some offenses are more minor than others, however, it is still a conscious effort to hurt or affect someone else negatively-- and that's the source of the problem. I truly wonder what causes that sort of behavior in someone, as I, along with most people, simply do not invest time or energy into hating or plotting against others. It seems like a full-time job.

I can theorize all sorts of reasons as to why someone would act this way: hate, jealousy, vengeance, etc. Yet, all of these reasons don't hit the root reason. It almost seems that some people are just innately ugly in their soul. This alludes to the timeless debate of whether one's personality is due to nature or nurture. Again, although our surroundings and environment do have a large effect in our behavior, that alibi only goes so far when multiple people are placed in the same environment, in the same situation, and only some are willing to cross moral boundaries in order to hurt the others. Just because an environment applies pressure to people, does not mean everyone is going to act out in malice, and it certainly does not give everyone an excuse to do so. Some people are simply conniving and, well, ugly inside.

If you have ever encountered people like this, I know from personal experience that it is such a drag. You have an enemy, essentially, whether you chose to or not, however based on their hatred towards you, they are now considered an enemy, a hater, and any other associated term. Know that they will do anything in their power to bring you down, even if it requires bending the truth and creating elaborate schemes, but you have to keep on doing you. Let them obsess over ways to bring you down. At the end of the day, their time and energy is being invested into bringing you down, while yours is being used to build yourself up. They will fall by default. So, keep your head high, act in grace, and make your money. They can sip on their Haterade and watch from below.

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