I saw a tweet the other day that read, "What's the point in dating if you're not dating for marriage?" My first thought was, so you are telling me you would go to lunch with someone on a first date and immediately start thinking about marriage and kids? That's a bit early to be worrying about that, don't you think?
I understand that the ultimate for dating is marriage, but that should not be the sole reason you date someone. Why would you decide that you don't want to date a person by saying you do not see yourself marrying them? How do you even know if you don't give them a chance?
Dating is not just about finding a husband or wife. The whole point is to experience different types of people and understand the kind of person you might feel comfortable spending a life time with. Dating isn't just about finding who you want, it's also about finding who you don't want. You can't just drop everyone so quickly because you don't see yourself marrying them. Then you are not really dating, you are trying to get married. We are still so young in college. Marriage should be one of the last things on our minds, right now.
Especially in college, dating is so casual. Honestly, if I went out with a guy and I knew he was evaluating me for marriage, I would buy him a ticket on the first train to crazy town. Just sit back and try to enjoy yourself. If you are not feeling it, don't pursue it. Dating is as simple as that. Don't over-complicate things.
A lot of ladies in college think they have to find a husband ASAP or life will be over. Trust me, I was there, too, but I promise you that is not important, right now. As a senior, I am having trouble getting my own life together and making time to just breath. I cannot imagine having to deal with fitting my complicated life into someone else's.
On the other side, I do know some people who have been with their significant others for a very long time, and they are perfectly happy planning their lives together. If you've got it all figured out, more power to you! I am just trying to explain that if you don't, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Date to date. Date to have fun. Date to get out there and learn about different people and about yourself. If you happen to enjoy that person a lot, and your dating eventually turns into marriage, then cool beans! But please, for the sake of your sanity, do not date for marriage.
