During my freshman year of college, I was in an elevator with my best friend, a guy I was friends with, and his very drunk roommate, who my friend was escorting home from a party. My friend’s roommate, who I barely knew, looked at my best friend and told her she was beautiful. And promptly turned to me and said something along the lines of, “You’re kind of pretty.” Kind of pretty. Because that’s how every girl wants to be described. I was kind of heartbroken (although I’d never admit that).
It was so unhealthy, and I’m not proud of it because I had given someone I barely knew the ability to tear me down with a half-insult. Honestly, “kind of pretty” isn’t even a real insult — it’s not like he definitively called me ugly or anything. But I was so focused on aesthetics that it made me much more upset than it should have.
Being pretty doesn’t guarantee being universally liked. Even some of the most outwardly beautiful people are the most hated (Kardashians, I’m looking at you). I’m not claiming that I have never judged someone based on their outward appearance — I definitely have. But, even though I may start a conversation with someone because of his or her beauty, what keeps the conversation going is personality.
That’s what’s important — personality. How I hold myself, how I present myself, how I speak, how much I smile, or how weird I am (I’m maybe a 9.5 out of 10 on that scale). If you like me as a person, you shouldn’t care how I look. Before, being called beautiful by a guy would make my day. And don’t get me wrong, I still love being called beautiful. But I’d so much rather be called beautiful by someone who knows me and has seen my flaws because that’s so much stronger of a compliment.
Moral of the story: pretty isn’t everything. There are so many things about me that I’d rather you notice. So what, if you don’t think I’m pretty? I know I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but I’m still worth talking to.
