I grew up never fully understanding how mental health worked. Anxiety runs in my family and I never understood it. Not until I was 16 and developed anxiety, the fear, the constant state of worry and impending doom. It haunted me, and as I've talked about it in the past I struggled for years trying to learn how to accept and deal with it. It's an everyday struggle and it isn't easy, and it doesn't get any easier.
I was ashamed to even admit I had anxiety at first, and go to therapy. It was terrifying and I saw how people at first not only judged me but other people who suffered from it. I suffered silently for a year before doing something about it. I tried and still try to be open with my battle and struggles of anxiety. I was so open with it at first and opened up too easily to people about my struggles with anxiety. As I got older I learned this only backfired on me at times, people use your struggles against you. I learned that I can be open about my anxiety with divulging too much information.
The horrible thing about society is that someone is always going to judge you, someone is always going to think badly of you no matter how hard you try to be a good person. The mental health stigma will never fully be gone but I hope that we can lessen the stigma and help others. Now at the age of 21 I'm no longer ashamed of my anxiety. Even though I'm not ashamed of it I still struggle in accepting it and not seeing it as baggage. So please remember how important your mental health is, please remember its okay to cry and break down at times.
Please don't let anyone ever make you feel less of a person because of your mental illness or use it against you. We're all warriors battling our minds daily, some days are good some aren't so good. But I'll still give credit to anyone who is struggling with mental illness and finds the strength to get up each morning and try and make it a beautiful day. Because on those tough days it isn't so easy. Don't be ashamed of your mental illness, accept it and help others learn to do the same.
