All our lives, we have been taught that women are supposed to be delicate little flowers, beautiful and sweet. Movies, TV shows, plays, books, all kinds of media filling our heads with a tale as old as time: Beauty is essential. We are taught this as children — all the princesses we grew up idolizing were sought after for their beauty. In adolescence, we learned from the movies and TV shows that an intelligent and kindhearted girl can finally get the boy of her dreams, but not before she gets a stunning makeover to turn her into someone who looks nothing like herself. In young adulthood, when we are taught about professionalism, we learn that the proper dress code for job interviews encourages women to wear professional yet form fitting clothing, light perfumes and an "appropriate" amount of makeup. With messages like these floating around in society, it's a wonder why girls these days are so obsessed with taking the perfect Instagram selfie or changing their profile picture on Facebook every three days.
Growing up, I was always told how beautiful I am, my whole family was, and I'm not going to lie — it definitely affected my perception of who I was on the grand scale. It gave me a solid self-esteem that contributed to a healthy confidence in my own abilities, but it caused many issues. For the longest time, I was convinced that I was destined to be a pretty face, a trophy wife, marry rich and smile wide. Thankfully, I grew out of that delusion and realized that I am worth so much more than an external appearance. I never wore makeup in high school. I was in the most rigorous course of study. I wore my jeans and T-shirts and worried little about how others perceived me because they thought I was cute anyway. Being attractive definitely has its perks, but like everything in this world, you have to take the good with some bad. Despite the continued efforts of third-wave feminism, the world will always think that the best thing a girl can be is a "beautiful little fool."
Now, I am definitely not saying that I am the height of attractiveness because I am certainly not. Being a relatively attractive young woman, I am subject to endless unwelcome criticism by those who have absolutely no bearing in my life. As far as the world is concerned, I would fare better if I smiled a little more, applied a bit more makeup, dressed up for class, worked out a little harder. Maybe if I bat my eyelashes and adjust my shirt just right, that police officer will let me off with a warning. As far as the world is concerned, my opinions mean less. I guess it's a good thing I chose to be a nurse because, let's face it, medical school would never have taken me seriously. As a woman, every skill I ever have will be in question. People will assume that with this phenomenon of seemingly vapid hotties in the workplace, I must be a vapid hottie in training.
Do you know what's really frustrating about it, though? This isn't a male perpetuated issue; it's fueled by women. Heard time and time again: Sex sells. When we enter into the professional world, we are essentially selling ourselves to corporations in hopes that we will get the job. Women, knowing this, will tart themselves up to present themselves in the most favorable way possible. Bear in mind, these women have skills. They are absolutely qualified for the position, but that isn't what they choose to bring attention to. Though men are more likely to get a job than a woman is, they are not seeking to undermine the women. It is the women who are undermining each other.
The mentality that you can get anywhere on looks is a flaw in and of itself. The assumption that you can get just as far as someone who has actually put the work in is volatile and absolutely the reason people will question your credentials. Because of this, the professional women who actually put the work in are pooled into the category of women who rely on their looks. The women who perpetuate the stereotypes are to blame. Women will use their good looks to charm their way to the top. This practice is degrading to women.
