Doctor, Please Don’t Minimize My Pain

Doctor, Please Don’t Minimize My Pain

I wouldn't be here if I were making it up


Dear Doctor,

I am here today to discuss what has been bothering me for months—years—my pain. I've done all that I can do: rest and every medication you can think of. I am consoling to you because I feel pinned against the wall. Please tell me what can be done to fix it. I'm running out of options.

Just because you cannot physically see migraines, it doesn't mean they're not as awful as any other disease or syndrome. In fact, it's worse. You're fighting your own body day by day in silence. Nobody knows but you unless you speak up. That is what I am doing by sitting here; speaking up for my body and my mind.

My pain cannot be put into words. It feels like someone shoved my brain into a box that continuously gets smaller, and doesn't stop compressing. The pressure can be sharp as knives, or dull as a cloudy day. It's not in one place, it's all over.

Stars and squiggles dance in my eyes like I'm in a night club. I am light as a feather, but due to being lightheaded, not happy. My sleep schedule is all over the place. It's cumbersome to feel out of sync with my body. I feel dissociated.

Doctor, please tell me what's wrong. What's the reason(s) behind all of this? What is driving my body to react to how it is? I just want to feel normal.

I cannot feel normal if you don't believe me or how severe my pain is. Is a visit to the emergency room not enough? Is experiencing pain of 10 on a scale of 1-10 for two weeks, not enough? I'm doing the best I can to translate what my body is communicating into human language.

Yes, I need that medication: nothing works. Yes, I need a referral for a neurologist: I’m seeking further advice on how to stop the madness. I'm not lying or a hypochondriac. I'm desperate, and I'm willing to do anything to go back to painless days.

Doctor, I don't care if the wait is 6-9 months. I don't care if I don't fit all the characteristics in order to consider being qualified to see a specialist. Please listen to me. I'm crying out for help.

This attitude can hinder the spirits. I've slowly started to accept my new reality. All I want is someone to listen and say, “I'm sorry you're feeling this way, and I'm going to put an end to it." I feel myself slipping away into a black hole of a person that I don't recognize. Doctor, save me before it's too late.

Doctor, I've left feeling more pessimistic than optimistic. Empty-handed and empty-hearted, medical training and guidelines got the best of me. What's next in my deck of cards? It looks like history will repeat itself.

Doctor, you're used to looking at patients with a clinical perspective. Take off those glasses and switch them for one minute. Put yourself in the patient's shoes. Imagine how they feel. Then, do everything in your power to alleviate their sorrows.

Doctor, the condition is beginning to eat me alive. Everyone I know has been saying that recently I've been angry and sad all the time: this isn't me. I'm keeping my head above the water, but pain pulls me under again. I'm withdrawing from my life, and I'm becoming a wreck.

I'm hungry to do what it is I enjoy to do. School work is difficult to manage when all you want to do is sleep. Working out is out of the question if you can barely walk or stand without feeling dizzy. My energy is too drained to feel up to attending social activities with friends. My cup is empty, and only you can fill it up, Doc. I can't live my life if I have to lock myself up in a dark, quiet room and sleep 24/7.

Doctor, although I enjoy your company, I would rather spend less time in your office. I want to be out in the world accomplishing what I want to do. I'm tired of feeling the way that I do. I'm being swallowed whole.

My pain is real. It's so real it slaps me hard in the face. It sneaks up on me and strikes out of nowhere. Fight the demons, Doctor. Don't side with them. They'll win. I'm screaming out but nobody can hear me; my voice is silenced.

I'm going mad. I feel alone because nobody understands me. I'm stuck and I feel that I'm going nowhere. You're the only one that can relate to me, and you do not even do that, Doc. I don't understand, you're supposed to be there for me when nobody else is. Even you've turned your back on me after all this time.

The bottom line is this: I'm done not knowing the root of problems and being in pain. I'm taking action as much as I can, but I cannot do this alone. I'm clawing my way to health, but I get pulled back if I'm not treated. My trust as a patient has diminished, Doc.

Doctor, don't minimize my pain. I won't get better.

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When You Make A Girl An Aunt, You Change Her World In All The Best Ways

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her the happiest girl in the world.


My brother and his wife recently blessed our family with the sweetest bundle of joy on planet earth. OK, I may be a little bias but I believe it to be completely true. I have never been baby crazy, but this sweet-cheeked angel is the only exception. I am at an age where I do not want children yet, but being able to love on my nephew like he is my own is so satisfying.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her a very protective person.

From making sure the car seat is strapped in properly before every trip, to watching baby boy breathe while he sleeps, you'll never meet someone, besides mommy and daddy of course, who is more concerned with the safety of that little person than me.

When you make a girl an aunt, you give her a miniature best friend.

There is something about an aunt that is so fun. An aunt is a person you go to when you think you're in trouble or when you want something mom and dad said you couldn't have. An aunt is someone who takes you to get ice cream and play in the park to cool down after having a temper tantrum. I can't wait to be the one he runs to.

When you make a girl an aunt, she gets to skip on the difficulty of disciplining.

Being an aunt means you get to be fun. Not to say I wouldn't correct my nephew if he were behaving poorly, but for the most part, I get to giggle and play and leave the hard stuff for my brother.

When you make a girl an aunt, you give her the best listening ears.

As of right now I only listen to the sweet coos and hungry cries but I am fully prepared to listen to all the problems in his life in the future.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her the best advice giver.

By the time my nephew needs advice, hopefully, I will have all of my life lessons perfected into relatable stories.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her a number-one fan

Anything you do in life sweet boy, I will be cheering you on. I already know you are going to do great things.

When you make a girl an aunt, she learns what true love is.

The love I have for my nephew is so pure. Its the love that is just there. I don't have to choose to show love every day, I don't have to forgive, I don't have to worry if it is reciprocated, it is just there.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her the happiest person in the world.

I cannot wait to watch my precious nephew grow into the amazing person that I know he is going to be.

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The One Thing Everyone Should Do Before They Graduate

Why I wish everyone could have shared in my end of school adventure.


The end of freshman year was filled with the abundant stress of final exams, teary-eyed goodbyes, and last looks at my dorm room on South Campus. The academic year was overwhelmingly busy, and I tried my best to soak in every single moment as a first-year college student. But as I'm sure many of you can understand, it's not always possible to make time for the adventures we so desperately desire. I found myself saying "I want to do that!" all year long, and here it was the last week of the year and my bucket list had barely been touched. All those Philadelphia excursions, dreamy coffee shop dates, and campus explorations that I looked forward to never ended up panning out…

… until last Thursday night.

With about half the freshman class moved out of South Campus, everything felt a little strange. There was barely a dinner rush at all in Donahue Dining Hall, and my room looked so empty it almost made me sad. Naturally, I called up a couple of friends. Within minutes, we met in the lounge, and we were off for our adventure.

Every single day on the way to labs in Mendel Hall, I walked past the beloved Falvey Fountain. It had become such a consistent part of my routine that walking past it felt like it was a necessary daily occurrence. But this time, we didn't walk past. In fact, we stopped dead in our tracks and admired its color changing beauty for a brief moment.

And then we dove in!

Yes, we jumped right into the fountain. First the daring adventurer of the group, then his sidekick, then the skeptic, and finally myself. This was definitely not allowed, but no one was around, and more importantly, no one cared. Being knee deep was freezing, but the adrenaline rush was too much to suppress. So we submerged further, dunking each other and splashing the icy water literally everywhere. My wet hair made way for the most epic hair flip of all time, and we all laughed joyously.

All the stress of looming final grades and the completion of projects, the bittersweet goodbyes to our newfound families, and the hassles of packing up for the year were washed away in that fountain, drowned in the euphoria of the moment. We were officially baptized in summer as it dubbed us the kings and queens of adventure.

Afterward, we wrung out our soaking clothes and snapped a quick pic of our drenched selves. Trying to escape the scene hastily, I dropped my bag of M&M;'s. They spilled everywhere, leaving streams of melty chocolate and food coloring running through the aftermath of our fountain dive. The scene looked like a bit of Willy Wonka's chocolate factory had exploded from the fountain and into the night.

I am far from kidding when I say that adventure is a must for everyone, at any stage of life. Whether it's fountain diving at Nova, or sky diving in New Mexico, something about us as human beings needs the unusual, exciting, and even hazardous experiences. This one was particularly cleansing and absolutely unforgettable.

So I implore you: go forth this summer and be adventurous! Explore hidden places, try new eats, shuffle a stranger's playlist, introduce yourself to someone on a whim, or just get in the car and drive with no destination in mind. This summer is for the bold; this summer's for you.

Happy adventuring!


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