It’s a typical afternoon like any other. I’m having a relatively good day and am in a pretty good mood. As I walk down the street and pass by several people, one man stops me and says “Hey honey, you should smile on a beautiful day like this.” I. Am. Livid. At least once every few weeks, some jerk tells me I need to be “happy” and “smile more.” But since when was it my obligation to be a walking Crest commercial? Why do I need to prove to everyone that I’m having a good day or that I’m happy? While I’m sure the young man meant nothing by it, I don’t think men realize how annoying and rude it is to command a woman to ‘be happy.’ Which is why I have one simple request for all of the gentlemen out there: Stop telling me to smile.
First and foremost, I think people need to be aware that they have absolutely no idea what is going on in someone’s life from day to day. Someone could have just lost their job, their home, their puppy, whatever. Depending on what’s going on in my life, the weather is not enough to brighten my mood. Call me a pessimist, but a little sunshine is often times not enough to distract me from the exam I just failed or the assignment due tonight that I haven’t even started.
Women are also always criticized for being emotional creatures. And to some extent, I’ll accept that stereotype. But if men are going to label us as such, then they need to understand that we have more than just two emotions (happy and sad). There’s a whole rainbow of feelings going on. Just like you all, we are complex, and our emotions reflect such. When something is funny I laugh, when someone makes me mad, I scowl. Surprise, surprise! I’m a real human being.
Last, but certainly not least, I will not tarnish my radiant skin just to please you. While many think that Resting Bitch Face (RBF) isn’t real it’s very much a reality. About 90% of the time I am very unaware of my facial expressions. Even if I was more aware, I would not be walking down the streets grinning like a Cheshire cat. Frowning too much and smiling too much can cause wrinkles, so I think my stoic gaze will do me just fine. Have you seen Angela Bassett’s skin? How old is she? Do you think she goes around smiling like Mary Poppins? Moisturizer and straight face will do more for you than all the Botox in the world my dear.
So to my ladies, please feel free to ignore or continue to ignore the jerks who feel you need to walk around with a Barbie doll smile plastered on your face. And for the fellas out there, please resist the urge to tell a beautiful young woman with RBF to smile. She is probably minding her business, and you should do the same.
