In high school, I had the same amazing core group of friends for nearly all four years. They were all genuine, had incredible senses of humor and were so supportive and caring. We meshed so well despite the different backgrounds and personality types we represented. They are still my best friends even though we are all at different colleges. They accept me for the nerdy weirdo I can be.
Isn't that all we want in a friend? Down-to-earth, trustworthy, caring and fun yet driven individuals? People who lift us up and inspire us? I would say so. That's what I wanted and that's what they gave me and so much more.
Yet throughout my high school career, I was plagued with a reoccurring question that easily got me heated: "Why are you friends with those lames? You're not lame and you're not geeky looking either!"
Unfortunately, I'm pretty sure this was supposed to be a compliment. I saw it as a testament to the superficial standards people use to pick and choose their friends by. I felt sorry for them. What they meant to say is, my friends weren't worthy of my friendship because they didn't look or act a certain way. They weren't rolling up to school in these nice new cars mommy and daddy bought them. So what if they didn't dress in the same pointless name brands that others did?
I didn't determine someone's potential to be a good friend by seeing if they had the latest iPhone or could be smacked on the cover of a magazine as a model. I didn't fit the bill on any of those things either! Still don't. But I believe I'm a good friend once we bond.
I chose my friends based on who they were as people, on their inner qualities, not whether they were sporting the latest fashion trends or if they had a good chance at winning a beauty pageant. I sure as heck wouldn't want my ability to be a good friend to be assessed by such shallow parameters. Despite this, I'm sure we are guilty of avoiding befriending a kid who looked "weird" because they dressed or looked different.
Yet in our world, the millennial generation tends to judge others according to who their friends are. Friend groups tend to look similar from individual to individual, not always a bad thing. Young people pick friends who look high caliber on the outside because it will make them look "cooler or "popular", but are they wholesome human beings on the inside? Not always.
That is a prime example of judging a book by its cover. My friends are perceived as lesser because they don't look like your standard "popular kid". How would you feel knowing your capability of providing companionship was being judged by your outfit, your face or your cell phone? Pretty lousy right?
Looks play a primary role in our superficial world. It is prevalent enough that it affects our friendships now too. Don't count someone out as a friend if they have old glasses or get clothing second hand. You don't know the reason they sport the items they do. They could be a life long friend who could be there for your final days.
I get clothes from the thrift store and I am most certainly not always looking my best. I'm not ashamed of that and I would hate for a "friend" to be ashamed of me because of those "quirks". I am proud of my friends because they are wonderful people. To this day, they are they best friends I have. They bring out the real me. What more could you want?
