So I know I promised more "Fifty Shades of Grey" and it's coming, but I'm just recapping the Democratic National Convention (DNC) because arguably that's more important than me reading shitty BDSM erotica and asking the question, "Is this Erotic?" (Hint: It's not).

So it's the first night of the Democratic National Convention and the Primetime Speakers of honor were Senator Cory Booker of New Jersey, the First Lady (and gift to humanity) Michelle Obama, Senator Elizabeth Warren of Massachusetts, and, of course, Senator Bernie Sanders.

To be honest I missed much of Cory Booker's speech. When I finally had access to a television, it was right near the end of his speech. From the signs that were provided to the delegates, it seems that the theme was "We Will Rise."

From the end that I caught though it appeared to be a good speech, and Twitter seems to have enjoyed it (though, I admittedly do follow a lot of self-identifying liberals and I am a self-identifying liberal).

A big theme this year is stressing the fact that the Democratic Party is definitely the party for human rights and is the party against the casual racism and islamophobia and homophobia that so permeates the Republican Party Platform (I mean have you seen that nonsense?).

Then, of course, the angels sang and Michelle Obama blessed us with her presence with an incredible speech.

The internet is already buzzing with how great Michelle Obama is and how great her speech was.

I literally cried.

I'm going to miss the Obamas when they're out of the White House. I'm all ready for the Obama resurgence when Michelle decides to run because I want it to happen.

I'm also ready for an Obama on the Supreme Court.

Can we get on that, America?

So after we received a blessing from Michelle, liberal idol and Massachusetts Senator Elizabeth Warren also spoke.

Another big message for the night is the importance of party unity and the literal actual apocalypse that will happen should Donald Trump become president.

I mean both Elizabeth Warren and Michelle Obama haven't always been on the best terms with Hillary Clinton, but they both gave her a full endorsement -- which is definitely important coming off of the illegally-obtained-through-the-Russian-government emails that went around during the political season. Emails that incensed the "Bernie or Bust" clan that still buzzes around the interwebs.

Then Bernie Sanders spoke and gave a speech.

Suddenly I was nervous. There are messages in various groupchats that I'm in (I'm in so many groupchats it's ridiculous). We debated whether or not he would actually endorse, something that, for the sake of not dooming the country, we should do.

I wish that he didn't wait so long into the speech to do so, but I'm happy that he did.

As someone who was a huge Bernie fan in the beginning, I just got worn out once it was clear that he wasn't going to win. I wanted sort of an amicable break, but the longer he stayed in the contest, the less likely that seemed.

But he did! He did endorse! Thank goodness, really. I'm just hoping that there's a big polls bounce after the convention.

That's a thing I should probably mention -- polls right now are wildly inaccurate just due to the fact that one party has had a convention (and the subsequent bounce) and the other party hasn't. It'll settle down in a month or so.