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Politics and Activism

In Shocking News, Disney Tries To Buy State Of Florida

Disney announces that they plan to expand their beloved park "Walt Disney World" throughout the entire state of Florida!

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Jamie McColgan

Disney announced that they plan to purchase the entire state of Florida came as shock to many, as there really hasn't been an attempt at a company trying to outright buy an official governed state, but here we are. Many will be quick to relate this situation to last year when Amazon tried to purchase the moon last year, but Disney states this is simply an expansion of their Orlando based theme park, "Disney World."

When asked to comment on the news, CEO Mickey Mouse had this to say, "Oooooh boy! With Disney owning multiple franchise heavy companies such as Lucasfilm, Marvel, and Pixar, we intend to make Florida be the first statewide theme park! Each county will have a different theme to it, so when people drive around the state, they will be fully engulfed in the magic that is Disney World magic ha HA!"

There's a lot of controversy currently surrounding this news, but one question seems to surface more than any other. Could they actually pull this off? Considering the billions of dollars of revenue that Disney rakes in every year, if they were to set up a payment plan with the United States government, many people think this could be a real possibility. The United States is tired of Florida anyway, it kind of makes sense just to scrap the state and call it quits.

It's the ultimate marketing/brand move by a company, I mean who else can say that they own one of the 50 states? Universal can't that's for damn sure.

I could bore you with all the legal governmental procedures that Disney would have to go through to not only purchase Florida but have it renamed to "The Walt Disney State." Instead, let's delve into the ingenious business model it would take to pull this off. Business owners are speculating that Disney will probably just remodel most of the infrastructure in the park. For example, office buildings will become more offices for all of Disney's business ventures, restaurants will be playfully re-themed to match the Disney films, and houses/apartments will either be given to cast members or rented out to the millions of Disney guests visiting the state park! Granted this venture will cost a lot of money, Disney believes with all the tourist attraction they will get from the entire state, it will be easily funded.

The future is bright for the constantly expanding Disney World, with them claiming new companies and more recently new land, it almost reminds me of the classic 14th-century powerhouse Ottoman Empire in their quest to capture the world! Mickey Mouse has been quoted as saying, "If this state park works out, the entire country is up next!" Until we are all owned by Disney we will be left with unanswered questions. Will Disney technically become a recognized national park? Will I have to leave the state of Florida? Is this even legal???

Only time will tell folks!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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