Recently, a famous rapper passed away, and his fan base took Twitter by storm. The rapper was in the middle of being accused of beating a gay man nearly to death and beating his pregnant girlfriend nearly to death.

A friend and I got into a heated conversation, leading him to say, "Well, isn't it innocent until proven guilty?", and I couldn't find it in my soul to give the rapper the benefit of the doubt and wish him a Rest In Peace.

Flash forward a day, and I realized what made me feel that way and why I couldn't sympathize with this abuser.

I was scrolling on Twitter and found a tweet that said something along the lines of why we blame women for staying with an abuser rather than blaming men for abusing women. That's when it hit me.

Suddenly, I remember something that, for some reason, my subconscious had decided to black out.

I vividly remember a time where my dad had begun to choke my mother in front of me while shoving her against a wall. I don't remember how old I was or the fight that caused it, but I do remember seeing it. In hind sight, if I had realized this when my friend was defending this rapper, I would have told him about it.

All in all, if my dad was still hitting and hurting my mom, then I probably would feel the same way about his death that I did about that rapper's death.

I understand that his music helped kids and made them feel good; however, I don't feel like that takes away from the pain that his victims felt. Why do his fans get to say that their feelings are more important than the feelings of the victims?

Yes, he made some people feel really good, but he also made some people feel really horrible.

I don't blame my friend for thinking the way he does; he hasn't gone through the same things as me. I fully believe that people think the way they do and feel the way they do because of the way they were raised and the things they've gone through.

Seeing abuse and violence firsthand at such a young age makes me feel sympathy for anyone going through situations of abuse. Even if the statements are just accusations, I am more likely to believe a victim than I am to believe the person being accused. While other people are more likely to believe the accused rather than victim.

I'm not preaching that there is a right or wrong way to feel about this rapper's death. I'm just trying to say that we should understand everyone will feel differently about the value of his life due to their own traumas and experiences.