Loving someone can be hard. You have to learn to accept everything that they have to offer, the good and the bad. But, most importantly you have to learn how to love them back in the right way, even when you do not understand why they have not accepted the love you have given so far.

I recently saw a video explaining that each and every person loves in two of five key ways. The speaker, a pastor, explained the concept of a book called “The 5 Love Languages,” by Gary D. Chapman. In this book it goes over the five different categories in which people receive and give love.

These five ways are: physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, and or gifts. If you are giving love in the solely the ways you enjoy receiving it, your relationships could be hindered. Once you learn the two ways in which you and your partner most like to receive love you can begin to foster an even stronger and more in sync relationship. Below the five love languages are explained.

1. Physical Touch

Pretty self-explanatory, I know where your mind is going with this one, but trust me it is not just what you are thinking about, in fact often times it is more about a thoughtful kind of touching. This means when someone receives love in a physical touch kind of way they like when you touch their hair, their arm, their leg in meaningful kind of ways that let them know you are here and you love being here.

2. Words of Affirmation

This can come in many forms. Compliments, reassurance, anything of that nature falls into this category. Simply telling your significant other that they look beautiful or handsome today is a sure fire way to make them feel loved. Another way to love your partner like this is to literally just affirm that you love him or her every day, make it your mission to tell them at least once a day that they are loved by you.

3. Acts of Service

To the person who receives love this way actions speak louder than words. A great way to give love to someone who receives from this category is to show them how much you love them. For example, a small note packed in their lunch, or a willingness to compromise on a sort of act after an argument, either way they will feel extremely loved through these small acts of kindness.

4. Quality Time

Two words. Undivided attention. These people receive love when you sit down with them and watch a movie or eat dinner with them. Anything you can do to give them or let them know that they have your attention is how they know they are loved. Making time to give them attention will be plenty for the person who receives love this way.

5. Gifts

Again this one is pretty self-explanatory. The person who receives love this way most enjoys getting gifts. Even small gifts such as flowers when they come home, or a homemade card just because they will appreciate any sort of gift you can give them. Not to mention the big gifts such as jewelry or a vacation. Either way, this person will feel loved with every gift, big or small, that they receive from you.