What is really the difference between hooking up and making love?
For many, it’s passion and emotional presence that makes the difference. Making love involves both people to be into each other beyond sexual attraction. Meaning, it’s an emotional, physical and sometimes spiritual situation. Most men and woman forget, ignore or don’t have a clue what intimacy really means. Intimacy in the areas I've mentioned is what honestly and truly makes the difference.
Many think that these two are one in the same; I have to respectfully disagree. Of course, in relationships you can just “f*ck” each other. It’s completely normal. In relationships, you have to maintain the creativeness in the bedroom, so a quickie on occasion or just “gettin' it in” is valid. But I'm speaking to the all of you that tend to meet a person that you have a really a cool connection with, and you haven’t talked about where you both stand as far as sex, relationships and boundaries. It’s the perfect time, the perfect place and the mood is there… Basically, sex is about to happen.
Here are some major keys to knowing exactly what the deal is when communication comes last:
Hooking up has little to NO build-up.
“Fucking” is pure domination.
It’s tangible lust. It’s hunger and It’s selfish, but not evil.
It serves one purpose, and one purpose only: YOU.
It has the ‘let's get-to-the-point' kind of perspective. When you’re not in the mood to talk, be mushy or share how each other's day went. Its pure lust, very unromantic and can be very cold.
I always say, "You can tell how someone feels about you by how gentle they are with your soul."
It’s true and that, you guys, IS THE JUICE. This is how you can clearly tell the two apart.
Making love has intention.
Cause and effect.
We can clearly separate the difference between a person who is into your body versus a person who is into your heart.
Making love is the sensual state. It the heartbeat, deep breaths and pulse connectivity.
The intent to please which in turn, pleases you. The most pleasurable sex, because it’s the most intentional. It’s a deep yearning to feel affirmed and valued.
“Making love has you feeling right. Full in the moment. And it puts your emotions on the radar.” -BKH
So, if you’re having a difficult time knowing if your “potential” wants your body or wants your love ask yourself these major questions, and let me know what your conclusion is:
The mood
Is the boom room clean? Does it look like there was an effort made to make things sensual? Is there foreplay?
Lights on? Romantic vibe?
If the answer is no, this is a “get it in” session y'all.
Dirty talk
Does this person want you to reach the highest point of ecstasy?
Or
Does this person "want to f*ck you so hard you"…. Get my point?
Positions
Are the words:
Come closer
Or
GO DEEPER [insert degrading word here]!
Hmmmm…..
How it feels
DO YOU FEEL GOOD, is the main question. But is there a clear connection of some sort?
Or
Do you feel pretty disgusting and have the urge to take the longest shower ever?
Satisfaction
SO SO SO SO SO SO SO IMPORTANT GUYS!
Did you have to fake your moans and groans?
Or
Did ol’ girl/boy give you that work? ;)
Post sex
Is the regret real?
Or
Was the cuddle game strong?
I got opinions from others who feel differently about the difference that I will never forget/really made me think and realize how important it is to pay attention.
"There is no difference. If you're good at what you do, then you can do both at the same time" -anonymous
SO, pay attention to how attentive this person is with your body, the reactions and all the essential parts to making sure you both are taken care of.
