To The Kids Who Didn't Want To Be Friends
Start writing a post
Student Life

To All The Kids Who Didn't Want To Be My Friend Growing Up

I forgive you.

370
To All The Kids Who Didn't Want To Be My Friend Growing Up

Making new friends is always an important part of a child's life and an important milestone in growing up. However, I was different from other kids and I never knew why until I was much older.

I watched a lot of TV growing up and always imagined myself in the friend groups that I saw on TV and even recreating the scenes with my Barbie's and Polly Pockets. I longed for friendship to have someone to play with and have sleepovers with but that didn't really happen much.

I will not mention names in here because I am not the kind of person that calls people out. Maybe those people have changed and maybe they didn't. Who really knows?

I was considered odd by my peers because I had different interests. I often stumbled in certain subjects and excelled in others (I was especially good at spelling). I also had quite the imagination and I always tried to think about what I was good at instead of what I wasn't.

Yes, I am on the spectrum. Maybe they didn't know that or maybe they weren't aware of what Autism is. On the bright side, this is one of the reasons why I am an advocate for people with disabilities. I want to teach those who may not know what it is.

I had a lot of friends up until 4th grade but it wasn't until then when I found out that kids could be very cruel.

One of my classmates even asked me "Hey Lisa did you know that you are r*******?" This person even once told a young child that she shouldn't grow up to be like me and even asked her to call me the r-word. One of them even told others that I had a disease.

Sometimes I even felt like an outcast in my own church. I used to wonder if the people in my small group actually liked me or if they just had to be nice to me because we were in the same group.

All I wanted was to belong.

All I wanted was for someone to not be afraid of me.

All I wanted was for someone to not steal my jewelry and then abandon me (happened in 6th grade).

I didn't want anything else but a friend who was there for me: someone who could invite me over to their house, someone to just invite me to hang out instead of me always doing the asking.

Sometimes I have flashbacks to those days thanks to anxiety, which makes it hard for me to trust people even though I really want to. It makes me want to go to every single event because I feel like I missed out on my childhood by not getting invited to a birthday party or just not being included.

Even though I now have anxiety I am not angry at you guys. You didn't know what I had. Maybe you guys are just now learning about Autism. We have all grown up since then, and writing this is actually very good therapy for me.

I am glad that I am still here, I am glad I went to school every single day and got that perfect attendance award. I am glad I made it to middle school, joined choir and ended up experiencing new things. I am glad I made it to high school, met my special someone who is now my fiancée and soon to be married in 2021. I got to be in two plays, took all sorts of cool classes and discovered a passion for photography. I got to graduate, go to community college, join clubs and become an officer for one of them, join the newspaper, and discover what I wanted to do with my life. I was able to graduate from there, transfer to a university to get my bachelors in journalism which is to be expected in 2020.

Maybe anxiety does make me remember these things that I don't wish to, but it also teaches me something.

From one of my favorite Disney movies The Lion King, "The past can hurt but you can either run from it or learn from it."

I chose not to run away. Instead, I chose to learn more. I have gotten help with a counselor about it, and I am even writing about it now.

For everyone out there who might be getting bullied and remembering some bad memories from their past, just know that it does get better, that this is just a small part of your very big life that you have ahead of you. Don't you ever forget that. Know that you are never alone and that you have a bright future ahead of you. Don't let anyone take away your sparkle. Be who you needed when you were growing up.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

15336
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

945149
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

122141
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lots of people sat on the cinema wearing 3D glasses
Pinterest

Ever wonder what your friend meant when they started babbling about you taking their stapler? Or how whenever you ask your friend for a favor they respond with "As You Wish?" Are you looking for new and creative ways to insult your friends?

Well, look no further. Here is a list of 70 of the most quotable movies of all time. Here you will find answers to your questions along with a multitude of other things such as; new insults for your friends, interesting characters, fantastic story lines, and of course quotes to log into your mind for future use.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments