Growing up in Mexico, I was taken to Quinceañeras after Quinceañearas after Quinceañeras. I was always amazed by how beautiful they looked and the attention they got. I wanted that. Hence, I was only 5 and of course, I wanted to be the center of attention. I think that encouraged it more and I would dream about having one. I remember when my aunt had her quinceañera and I was part of it too. It was an amazing experience.
By now, you are probably thinking what is a Quinceañera? Well, a Quinceañera is a Hispanic or Latin tradition of celebrating a young girl’s coming of age- her 15th birthday. This signifies her transition from childhood to womanhood. It is a chance for a girl to feel like a princess, to wear that huge puffy dress and have all eyes filled with admiration for her. It’s her time to dance a graceful waltz for her audience and show she is no longer a child, but a woman.
Like I said before, I wanted all of that. But over time, my desire to have a Quinceañera began to fade away. By the age of 13, I felt that they were so overrated. I found no point in dressing up and putting a show for people who were just going to criticize. The only reason I knew this is, it’s because I had been to past quinceañeras and I would always hear people criticize the smallest details.
When I told my parents, I didn’t want a quinceañera, relief washed across their faces. Nevertheless, they proceeded to ask me again, and I said no. Family members would constantly ask why I didn’t want one. So, I would tell them that it was my decision and I wasn’t going to change it. I knew that we weren’t financially stable to have one --quinceañeras are very expensive-- and it did not feel right having one without the rest of my family who was in México. For that special day, I want them by my side, and I knew that there were certain circumstances that prevented them for doing so.
So, when October 2012 came around, I did not have a quinceañera and to this day I have no regrets. Yet, this didn’t stop me from having the father-and-daughter dance with my dad in the living room. That day I received a special present from my maternal grandparents who gave me a ring with the number 15 on it. It meant everything to me, and it still does.
However, there are times that I imagine being that girl: the one twirling on the dance floor wearing a beautiful, silk gown. But I do not mind leaving that girl behind because deep inside I knew she was not me.
So, for any young Latina girls who are uncertain at the moment. Here is a tip: if you decide to celebrate your quinceañera, go for it and enjoy it to the fullest because it’s a day you won’t forget. If you don’t want your quinceañera, it’s okay instead that day do something that it is meaningful to you. There is no right or wrong choice. Do what you think is best for YOU and don’t worry, your family will respect your decision and love you no matter what.
