First off I would like to say that just because you are a Christian does not mean it's all roses and rainbows. We have our bad days just like everyone else.

My life as a christian has been amazing but it has been the hardest time of my life. I'm sure you "christians" are all thinking "it's easy for me," but let me ask you a question. Do you ever lay in bed at night staring at your wall and wonder if you satisfied God that day? If not then you may need to self evaluate.

Life as a christian isn't meant to be easy, I understand that but there is a line between it just being difficult and actually being depressed that you'll never be good enough for God. It's crippling to think about and paralyzes a person. I'm not saying all this to scare you if you are a christian or to keep non-christians from giving their life o christ, but rather informing you on the truth.

Being a christian is so much pressure, but it's so rewarding. I mean when you really think about it, how do we even qualify to get into heaven? I have to tell myself daily that I am enough and God loves me. Although, sometimes that doesn't make me feel any better, honestly.

I think one thing that depresses me most is that there aren't very many true christians out in the world. I mean, if someone asked everyone if they wanted to go to heaven, I feel like everyone would say yes. I mean who wouldn't wanna live in heaven right? And i think this is where we get confused an our imaginations take place.

For instance, as a child I used to dream of heaven being made of bacon and chocolate with marshmallow roads... but we all know that's not even comparable to what it really will be. I think we get confused because churches often tell us "all you gotta do is say you believe, get baptised and then go on your own way, as long as you stay a member of the church you'll go to heaven"

But I'm gonna burst your bubble and just say that all that is a bunch of lies. We have to do much more than that, such as, praying. Oh no! not the "P" word... I think we look at this word as a bad word, but really we should find comfort in it and guidance.

If all this doesn't scare you, then I don't know what will. I mean I guess what scares me most is the unknown. Yes, I'm a christian and I believe with my whole heart that God is alive, I just fear that I won't be enough for him. like, look at his son... PERFECTION.

How can we even add up?

That's the most depressing part about being a christian.

The unknown.