If you were between the ages of 9 and 11 during the 2007-2009 peak of the Naked Brothers Band, don’t lie and try to tell me you were not in love with one of the Wolff brothers. They were the older, “hotter,” rock stars we all dreamed of, right? AND they were 13 so, basically adults to us, but also totally possible to date us at that age, right?
(Personally, Nat was my first celebrity crush and I can honestly say, I’m STILL not over him because duh):
A couple weeks ago, my roommate caught me streaming some NBB throwbacks on my Spotify (because who has time for private browsing), and called me out. Honestly, I’m not ashamed for jammin’ to my 9-year-old bops, it was a great trip down memory lane. You know you still know the words.
So, ladies and gentlemen here is the definitive ranking of the Top 10 Naked Brothers Band songs:
10. "Banana Smoothie"
So catchy – so innocent. Honestly just too heartwarming to forget it. Don’t forget, you can always have more cowbell.
9. "Catch Up With The End"
Yes, Nat, preach to me about being independent and learning from your mistakes. I’m here for this. Also, the falsetto, and that guitar solo. YAS. Maroon 5, vibez. 10 year old me is screaming.
8. "I’ll Do Anything"
Continuing with the baby Maroon 5 feel, Nat really shows off his falsetto here. So pure. You-oh-ooh! The lyrics and the metaphors, “I won’t die for you, I’ll live for you.” So emotional.
7. "I Don’t Want To Go to School"
Eat your hearts out, little rebellions. The rock choir and the edgy vocals made me feel like a badass- especially because the toils of elementary school were oh-so rough. I can still feel the angst here today in 2017. Hit those drums, Alex.
6. "Crazy Car"
CRAZY CAR, UGH. FEELS. This was THE iPod song. This song made you feel things. This song was middle school for me, tbh.
I used to sing this in gym class. Honestly, true can’t run from yourself. Nat and Alex teach me about life. Here we go again with the edgy rock vocals. Electric guitar for days. Great for dancing around your room in your Limited Too pajamas after bedtime.
4. "Nowhere (I Miss My Family)"
PREACH. Every college kid – ever. “The roads so far and we couldn’t walk it. In the middle of nowhere.” Frick, I need Christmas break ASAP.
3. "If That’s Not Love"
The iconic theme has all the elements of a mid-2000’s pop banger; synth, a catchy and repetitive guitar riff, and of course the sparkle sound effects. “The magical feeling has begun.”
2. "Long Distance"
Nat, please don’t get me started. I still know the words to this one; was the first song I downloaded on my iPod Nano. Reverb days. It’s like a young Modern Baseball or Bleachers – so depressing but SO good. A+ for breakups and for brooding about Kyle in the other 4th-grade class.
1. "Beautiful Eyes"
Ah, this one has to make the #1 spot because it’s simply the OG love song. Every girl put her Lipsmacker’s lip-gloss on in the mirror to this one. Why is this 13-year-old boy sweeter than college boys? Take notes, gentlemen.
Honorable Mention: "Alien Clones"
A real nice branching out of genres, a bop if you will. Alex really gets out his anger in this one, the ramble truly embodies what it means to be a kid. Used to sing this when I was pissed at my sister for God knows what. Also, it’s incredibly ridiculous, hilarious and adorable. Pure. Childhood.
Now go back and listen to all your favorite childhood jams because they're 100% on Spotify. Happy Listening.