Everyone knows long distance relationships are tough. Some people don't even attempt to try to date someone who does not live in their immediate area, and some people test it out for only a short period of time before giving up. Those who are truly dedicated to a long distance relationship know that there are absolutely no redeeming qualities about distance, and long distance relationships cannot possibly teach you skills that you can apply in daily life beyond the relationship. It's probably not worth your time to try out a long distance relationship and see what you'll learn. Here's why.
1. Travel
Long distance relationships force you to travel to new places- a different city, state, or even country. You might have to drive for hours or travel by plane or train. You are forced to experience a new place, see new things, and make memories in unfamiliar territory. Who really wants to be forced to leave the comfort of their own area?
2. New People
If you decide to leave the safety of familiarity of home and venture to a new place to spend time with your significant other, chances are, you are going to have to interact with your SO's friends, family, and/or coworkers. This means that your SO's friends potentially become your friends, and you form new relationships with people you never would have met otherwise. Now it's not just a long distance relationship with your SO, but a long distance relationship with new friends as well.
3. Money
Traveling takes money. Even if you have a car and your SO lives fairly close, you have to buy gas at least. Long distance relationships teach you how to budget appropriately and force you to give up a night out or seeing a movie, so you can save for your next trip. No one wants to learn how to budget responsibly, right? What a hassle.
4. Trust
How are you supposed to keep tabs on your SO at all times if he or she doesn't live near you?! What if he or she doesn't Snapchat every second of their night out, and you don't know who he or she is with? Long distance relationships take a lot of trust, and in today's world, you can never be too sure. Better to not try and build trust and forgo the relationship all together.
5. Planning
Long distance relationships require a lot of planning. Planning travel arrangements, dates that work for both you and your SO, time off work, accommodations for any pets that can't travel with you...the list goes on. In long distance relationships, you have to be a solid planner, or get good at planning really quick. Planning is time-consuming and definitely has no real-world applications, so really this is just another major reason why long distance relationships are useless.
6. Patience
In a long distance relationship, you obviously don't get to see your SO everyday. You might not even see them every month. Long distance relationships force you to be extremely patient and wait days, weeks, or months until you see your SO again. How can one possibly apply this skill to everyday life beyond waiting to see your SO, especially in a world where instant gratification is a top priority for people? You probably can't. Give up now.
7. Being on Your Own
This is a biggie. In a long distance relationship, you can't intertwine your identity with your SO, because, well, it's pretty hard to do that when you don't see him or her for long periods of time. You're on your own. This type of relationship forces independence and confidence in yourself. Yuck.
8. Creativity
When you can't go on "normal" dates every weekend, you have to think outside the box. Maybe you watch a movie "together" with your SO over Skype, or you eat a meal "together" via FaceTime. Creativity and problem solving skills are something no one needs to develop in their lives.
9. Spark
When you go months without seeing your SO, the "spark" in the relationship tends to stick around longer than usual, since there's such a massive rush of euphoria when you finally see your SO again. Long distance relationships are constantly exciting and can feel new, and doesn't everyone crave complacency in their relationships? No one needs the spark to stick around longer than a few months, right?
10. Appreciation
When you're in a long distance relationship, you can't escape appreciating things more when you're with your SO. While eating pizza and watching a movie may not seem like a big deal to couples who see each other every day, it's a huge deal when you're in a long distance relationship. These feelings of gratitude can really overwhelm you and make you feel all the feels, which everyone knows is the worst.
11. Affection
There isn't cuddling or hand holding all the time in a long distance relationship. You're forced to show affection other ways, usually by communicating with words instead of actions. In today's world where so much of relationships are focused on the physical side of things, communicating your love and affection for someone through words is unheard of. Having to list the reasons why you love someone instead of a hot and steamy make-out session? Crazy! Insane! How could that possibly strengthen a relationship?
As you can tell, long distance relationships are not the worst. In fact, if you're willing to put in the time and effort, they can be pretty great and teach you a lot. As someone who has been in a long distance relationship for nearly a year, I've learned many valuable skills that I apply daily. Yes, I obviously wish I could see my boyfriend every day, but I appreciate our time together so much when I finally do get to see him. Distance can make or break a relationship, but the most important factor to "making" it is consciously choosing that distance won't define the relationship. To my fellow comrades in long distance relationships, keep on keeping on, and to those who are considering it...do it! They're really not so bad.
