It's puzzling to me what death can bring out in a family. In my opinion, the death of a family member should always bring a family together. Depending on the family dynamic, that may not be the case. Death can also do the total opposite. It can cause major rifts or tear a family further apart than before.

To watch this firsthand is impactful, to say the least. It's so emotional that it is exhilarating to be caught in the middle of it. After the recent and somewhat sudden death of a member of my family, I was able to witness firsthand a few things that really stood out to me.

First and foremost, I know this is cliché, but blood is not always family.

Sometimes, people have a funny way of showing you their true colors. Through their subconscious emotions, their fears, pains, and abuse, whether mental or physical. They use death as a way to justify their negative behavior. They lash out in strife and anger.

You see a true form of what's been festering; it's not truly them. They just run with their new found "power", and channel it as a form of superiority. They have a lot of healing to journey through.

You must know, though, don't combat their newly surfaced repressed complex. You have to live with love and, hopefully, they find it in themselves to follow suit.

As I have just physically lost an extended family member, I have also just lost another due to random careless acts of egotism. It was his choice to become lost. I carry no negative vibes in my being towards him. I can't make him understand what he does not want to. His choice was made. I just have to keep moving and maybe, one day, he'll understand.

Besides the loss that just transpired in my extended family, I feel that these few happenings have brought my immediate family closer together. He stood strong in the face of negativity, and we were all there for each other. I feel like I have just witnessed two sides of the extreme.

I lost two members, but I got even closer to others.