Seven months and 12 days ago, I lost my best friend. The one who knew how to make me smile when I was down, the one who knew me better than I knew myself, the one that was my pride and joy. Losing a best friend is something I hadn't ever thought about until June 10, when I woke up to the worst phone call. The one thing I wanted then and there was to hold my best friend and tell her I loved her one last time.
But here I am, seven long months later and somehow still smiling. It's so hard to believe I've been living without my other half for this long. I question the concept of happiness for those who haven't ever experienced a living Hell. Today, I miss her. I miss her every minute, of every hour, of every day. However, the life lessons I've learned today are from her and what is amazing is that she is in heaven continuing to teach me lessons as if she was here right now.
From me to you now reading this, here are the five things I've learned from losing my dearest best friend.
1. Never forget to tell the people you love "I love you."
I don't ever go to bed without telling my parents and roommates I love them. You never know when your last day could be and it's so important to share your love with the ones you love. Say "I love you" to your friends and family every chance you get, because I would do anything to tell my sweet best friend I love her.
2. Pain can be an OK thing.
Wait...what? I sure as hell know that seven months ago I wouldn't be saying this. But without this pain that I have, I wouldn't understand the true meaning of happiness of our special friendship. Having her on earth with me the short time she was here she taught me my happiness. Let's be honest, I haven't felt that happiness yet, but I look forward to the day when I see her again and have that warm in my heart that she gave me.
3. Pick your battles.
OK, let's think about. It's not worth fighting with friends or family over the small stuff. Not worth getting mad about who said what, or who did this, or he said she said...it's so easy to get caught up in friend drama, but once you lose a best friend, it makes reality real. It's not worth fighting with your friends, it's just not. If something makes you upset, talk about it with them. Don't get caught up and don't sweat the small stuff.
4. Live your life to the fullest.
How cliché, right? How many times do we hear this in a day? But ask yourself right now...do you live your life to the complete fullest?
5. Once you hit rock bottom, you can only go up.
I'll admit, losing my best friend this summer was the day I hit rock bottom. I hit so hard it knocked me completely off my feet. But, I fought through the pain, the grief, the anger, and knew that I can only go up from here. I am still attending school, working and being me. Does that mean that is still doesn't hurt? No, but you have to keep moving. It's so easy to get caught up in life and just give up. I've realized you cannot. Giving up just isn't an option. Accomplish your goals and never say never!
So, my advice to you and all my readers is simply this: LIFE IS SO SHORT. Don't spend a day being angry when you could be with your best friend. Don't fight over who said what, because in the long run you won't remember the fights, but the laughs. And when you know you've hit rock bottom, just know that you can only go up from there.
Anna Speed was someone so special to me, someone who taught me so much on this earth and even more with her gone. She's changed my life and I have been changed for good. Life is so precious. Take this advice and go make someone smile today!
Sincerely yours,
The second half of CCCXII.
