Two years ago my life was completely different than what it is now. I have had some extraordinary times and some painful times. However, everything that has happened to me has impacted who I am, who I want to be, and where I stand. While I do not have any regrets, there are some things I wish I could go back and tell myself now.
Dear past me,
That big "life-changing" decision you're trying to make, about which college you want to go to, just go with your gut. Trust yourself; you never have really let yourself down before and you're not about to start. But, spoiler alert: You do end up where you belong. You folded up what felt like 18 years of your life and put it in a small, pink duffel bag. Packing was stressful, but saying goodbye to your closest friends and family was anything but easy. You'll say your toughest goodbyes the night before you leave. But please know, not all goodbyes are forever. You will always make time for the people who mean the most to you and from moving three hours away, you'll learn who means the most to you.
Stay focused.
There are going to be people at college who do not take it as seriously as you do. Do not fall down with them. It is important to let loose a bit; say yes to Friday movie nights, say yes to trying new things, and say yes to going to that frat party. However, you should also say yes to studying with classmates, say yes to the all-nighters writing papers, and say yes to going the extra mile by meeting with your professors. You're only going to thank yourself in the end.
In this next year you are going to meet some of the best people you have ever met before. Have fun with them, and learn from them. That being said, you are also going to meet some of the worst; just stay away from those people. They say, you should be able to count your closest friends on one hand; keep that in mind. Know that some best friends forever really aren't forever. However, do not regret the memories you have made together. They have all impacted your life in one way or another, whether that's helping you figure your life out, or just adding a few great daily laughs, even if they are no longer in your life.
You'll experience heartbreak.
...and that will cause you to feel like your world is drastically falling apart. It really is not. You somehow always have your life together even when you think you don't. Anyway, he is not worth your time or emotion. Stop wasting so much energy and so many tears thinking about him. In the long run, ending it was the best thing that ever happened to you. I mean, you lost him, but you found yourself, and somehow that was everything.
You'll find yourself.
You will find things you like that you never thought you would ever like. Your obsession for the moon continues to grow. Somehow, coffee becomes your best friend and you discover that you are actually way more ambitious and self-motivated than you ever thought you would be.
Once you find yourself:
Keep being yourself. Keep smiling, be ambitious, and stay strong.
This is only the beginning.
