I am not here to tell you that you are a failure. Or that you will not survive without Jesus. Or that your future is not bright or full of exciting things.

Dear Non-Believer,

I get it. I really do. You probably have an experience where someone threw Jesus in your face. Similar to the game of dodgeball you played in elementary school. The ball is coming right for your face and the thought of moving out of the way never crossed your mind. So you sit and listen, evaluating every word you are hearing. The words are cynical and demeaning. You feel like a failure because you don't believe. You question how they hear God when all you feel is silence and eeriness. Suddenly, you ran. You didn't want any part of a community where they condemned people for not believing what they believed.

Worshiping a God is just not you. And how dare someone that praises a loving God still call you unworthy, failing, and sinful.

So you create a life without religion. And you are happy. Waking up every morning with a smile on your face and going to bed knowing that you had a good day.

And control. You love it and crave it. Everything is on your timing. You do you.

Assumingly, I bet you have a hard time with religion because it is completely out of your control. Trusting someone with your life that you can't hear, feel, or touch seems uncanny. That being said, you encourage people to believe what they want. Religion is to each its own. And that's okay.

As a cradle Catholic, I will never throw Jesus at your face. I serve a God who has brought me from the lowest of lows to the highest of highs. There have been plenty of times where I didn't act like a Christian. I could've chosen a path that brought me closer to the Lord, but I chose a bumpier road. I have said things that I didn't mean and did things that hurt the people I love.

I am a sinner.

I have chosen to give my life to Him, understanding that I will continue to make mistakes. There will be times when I make rash decisions without leaving them up to the Lord. And I will have to deal with the consequences. I know that whatever happens tomorrow is up to Him. And I will praise him from the moment my eyes open to the moment they close at night. I trust He has a plan for me and there is no reason for me to worry.

But I am human.

I still worry. I get anxious and nervous that my life is going to be spent on the side of the road. I worry that I heard God wrong. I worry that the one's I pushed away are the people I should've held tighter. Lastly, I have a hard time understanding why God takes people out of my life and other people's lives who we feel like we can't survive without.

But that is faith. There are days when everything makes sense. And other days you can't name one task you did right. The hardest part about believing in God is trusting that everything is on His watch. He is in control of today, tomorrow, and every day that follows.

And if you haven't found faith, you're not a failure. You are not unworthy.

Everything is on His timing. Maybe He just hasn't called you yet.