Dear Men, Don't Tell Me Everything In The Book.

Dear Men, Don't Tell Me Everything In The Book.

I've been hurt by some guys who didnt treat me right, so now I have a wall up.

Raise of hands ladies for those who've been told everything in the book by men? If you have you're not the only one to be told everything. Sure, men, y'all can be smooth and sweet but don't say something just to get the girl. Be real with the girl you're actually interested in because she'll respect you more than you think.

Over the years I've been that nice and naive girl that fell for everything in the book by men, which lead to me getting hurt. Now, I'm not so much naive to the things being said, but when a man is actually being upfront and honest I have a hard time believing it because of my past. I've been hurt too many times by some guys that didn't treat me right, that now I have a wall up.

It all started a couple years ago after I'd broken up with my ex boyfriend and there was another guy that I came across. He seemed like a pretty cool guy, or so I thought at the time. Well, we began the whole texting thing and he was saying all the things every girl has heard. I shrugged it off like, "yeah, right okay. This guy is just doing his thing". I eventually told him I didn't believe a word he was saying so it took some convincing on his part. My naive self finally gave in and believed him for some stupid reason and let me tell you that was a mistake. The more we got to know one another the more confident he became in the things he said and how he said it. Then he began to manipulate me with my mind and being my sweet self, I didn't speak up at the time but I should have. I didn't know what was going on at the time until I sat down with my friends and told them everything. They were like, " Kiersten he's a jerk he's mentally abusing you and manipulating you. You're better than that and deserve better." All I have to say is I had a few words for him once I collected my thoughts about what I was going to say. Honestly, I felt so dumb after my friends pointed everything out. I was so upset because I was so used to my ex boyfriend who had been a great guy but it just didn't work out with us.

Ever since that guy, I have been sadly very cautious and haven't been able to believe anything a man tells me anymore, because he completely destroyed my trust in men for now. So, gentlemen, I say this with kindness, please be real with the girl you're interested in and don't mess with her mind.

Cover Image Credit: Kiersten Ulversoy

Popular Right Now

To The Girl Who Isn't Graduating On Time, It Won't Feel Any Less Amazing When You Do

Graduating is something to be proud of no matter how long it takes you.


To the girl who isn't graduating college "on time,"

I promise, you will get there eventually, and you will walk across that graduation stage with the biggest smile on your face.

You may have a different journey than the people you grew up with, and that is OKAY. You may have some twists and turns along the way, a few too many major changes, a life change, you may have taken most of a semester off to try to figure your life out, and you're doing the best you can.

Your family and your friends don't think less of you or your accomplishments, they are proud of your determination to get your degree.

They are proud of the woman you are becoming. They don't think of you as a failure or as someone any less awesome than you are. You're getting your degree, you're making moves towards your dreams and the life that you have always wanted, so please stop beating yourself up while you see people graduating college on time and getting a job or buying a car.

Your time will come, you just keep doing what you need to do in order to get on that graduation stage.

Your path is set out for you, and you will get there with time but also with patience. The place you're at right now is where you are supposed to be. You are going to thrive and you are going to be the best version of you when you graduate and start looking for a company that you will be proud to work for. Don't look on social media and feel less than, because at least you're still working towards your degree that you are finally passionate about. You will be prepared. You will be ready once the time comes and you cross the stage, move away, and start your journey in whatever field you're going into.

Don't question yourself, and be confident in your abilities.

With love,

A girl who isn't graduating on time

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Goodbye School, Hello Real World

I'm ready for ya!


It's starting to hit me.

I've been in school, year after year, since kindergarten. Maybe even pre-school!

Now, I'm about to graduate with my bachelors in communication and I couldn't be more proud of myself. I'll say it. I often sugarcoat it or suppress it but d*mn it. I'm going to applaud myself. It was hard work. It took a lot of motivation, determination, (caffeine), and willpower to get to where I am today. I worked my ass off.

That being said, I can't help but think... What is life without due dates? What is life like without scrambling to turn in an assignment that's due at 11:59 PM? What is life like with actual sleep? Sleep? I don't know her.

Like I keep telling my boyfriend and my parents, I don't have it all figured out. At least not right now. But I will, and I'm in no rush to land my dream job right now. If anything, I want to take a year to myself. I want to travel. I want to sleep in if I d*mn well please! I want to read as many books as I want. I want to write till my fingers fall off (OK, maybe not that).

You get the jist.

I'm free. I can do and be whatever I want. And you know what? That's terrifying.

I'm lost. I've followed this structure for so long. Now what?

I don't have all the answers yet. But for now, at least right at this very moment, I'm so thankful to have been able to receive such an amazing education. And to be able to say I'm graduating with my bachelors in communication at 21 is an accomplishment in itself.

Related Content

Facebook Comments