Tupac had us in our feelings when he dropped "Dear Mama" in 1995. Though some of us weren't old enough to understand the meaning of those lyrics at the time, almost everyone knows this as the ghetto anthem for mothers. It's iconic and shows the true love we all have for our mothers. Despite Tupac's upbringing, he still made it known in one of the most quotable lyrics of the song, "and even as a crack fiend, mama, you always were my black queen, mama," and no matter how strained the relationship might be, one can't deny all the sacrifices that mothers make for their children.
Mothers are sometimes overlooked for all the good they do simply because it's "expected" for a mother to be the protector, the healer, and the friend.
Though my mother and I butt heads sometimes, I wouldn't trade her for anything in the world. I always say that the strongest people in the world are the ones who grow up without a mother because I can't fathom the thought of not having mine. Having her to hear my every cry, and to just be there for me when things aren't making sense is how I have survived the stress life brings.
Preparing for college was one of the most stressful periods of my life. Weighing financial security, the accreditation colleges would have for my major and most importantly the distance from my family. Through many application fees, prayer, stressful finals my mother was there the whole way through. Though my senior year of high school put our relationship through some trials and tribulations it showed me how much I had to achieve to make sure she never had to struggle again. Leaving my mom for college was one of the hardest things for me to accomplish. I don't know how she managed to take care of three girls by herself and always keep us fed, well kept, and living better than expected, based on income.
My mom constantly shows me that the simple things, like gifts every Valentine's Day, random FaceTime calls, or just spending time together, signify that even if I don't have a significant other's love, I will always have the love from my mother. Bonds are broken and restored everyday. Though my mother and I have hit some low points in our relationship, I wouldn't trade that for a "better" upbringing. What's hard times without the testimony? and how harder would the struggle be if you didn't have someone rooting for you despite your imperfections and short comings?
As I start to mature and fend for myself, I am seeing all the work put in towards making you a better woman. The things she has instilled in me at a young age, I was angered by. The chores and responsibilities were never enjoyable, but now I'm blessed I even got the opportunity to experience that so early. My mother has always been over protective and I appreciate that because, though she was picky on where I went and with whom, I've managed to stay alive in a city that many lose their lives in. My mother has relocated her life, changed religions, and struggled to make a way for my sisters and me, and she doesn't get the credit she deserves.
Everyone knows that Hampton University is far from cheap, yet she's doing everything she can to make sure I finish the rest of my three years there. It's not every day that you run across a mother who comes all the way to your school to cook you and your friends a meal in your dorm hall kitchen. It's not every day that you have a mother planning ideas and giving you suggestions on your future non-profit organization. And it's not every day that you have a mother rooting for you to build a relationship with the father that has abandoned his responsibilities in raising you.
To say my mother is my best friend is an understatement. She's my biggest fan, my hero, my go-to, my life fixer. She's everything I need and more, and she's taught me how to do everything but survive without her. So I pray that I don't have to do that anytime soon.
Dear Mama, you are appreciated.
Love,
Your first-born
