Break out the Aussie hairspray, hot glue gun, and extremely uncomfortable, brand-spanking-new Capezio jazz shoes, because its competition time, folks. Whether you competed nationally or regionally, four times a year or four times a month, dance competitions were the biggest struggles and greatest memories of your dance career as a kid. From forgetting your fishnets at home and frantically borrowing a pair too big and with a giant hole, to blaring “Come on Eileen” in your dressing room, I have never felt so untouchable in my life. Let's take a trip down memory lane and recall what REALLY made us competition dancers:
1. You never left your dressing room without your animal slippers, secret stash of candy, and rhinestone-covered company jacket.
2. When you saw other girls in said rhinestone-covered company jackets, you judged them by their colors, the brand, and the quality of stones. You also judged them because they weren’t from your studio.
3. Not only were you trained to change from tan tights to paws in a minute and a half time span, you learned how to put on fake eyelashes at age six with minimal lighting and a shitty caboodle mirror.
4. You also walked around in your fake eyelashes a good ten hours after the competition because you would attract attention when you would stop at a fast food joint. Even though you always complained about “everyone staring,” you know you totally loved it.
5. When it came to actually performing on stage, it never failed; you always had to pee right before you went on.
6. You then contemplated if you had time to run to the bathroom before they called your dance, but the two layers of tights, the headpiece, and the one-piece costume kind of stood in your way.
7. Once you were on stage, you felt invincible; you felt as if the blood that ran through you was liquid gold as you nailed your fouette sequence and battement-catch turn while flashing your best facials to over hundreds of people.
8. After you bowed and dramatically jazz walked off stage, you tasted blood in your throat as you huffed and puffed, feeling as if you just ran the Chicago Marathon.
9. Your mom always asked, “How’d it feel?” and you’d lie and say “good” because you honestly blacked out during those two minutes and don't even remember being on stage.
10. When it was your turn to watch, you were one judgmental son of a bitch, scoffing at the girl that hopped her triple pirouette and groaning when “River Deep, Mountain High” came on for the fourth time in the same jazz category
11. When awards time came, time stood still as your fate as a dancer was determined by whether or not you received “ultimate high gold” or “platinum” for your dance.
12. Life was really good when you would win in your category or overall and got to run up to microphone and eagerly tell everyone what dance company you danced for.
13. People always asked you “if you won your competition.” Trying to explain that to a non-dancer was like trying to teach your dog a foreign language so you just smiled and always said, “yes, yes we did."
14. When you had to pack up your garment bag and say goodbye to your second family for the weekend, you cried and embraced them, knowing that you would be in the studio the next day.
15. Nothing compared to the memories you made and the pride you had for your studio during competition weekends. Your mom letting you skip school the following day to sleep in never hurt either.
