To us, it seems like our insecurities blast like sirens. "My thighs are too big." "My arms are too wimpy." "This pimple on my chin is shining brighter than the Las Vegas Strip."

It's not just our outward features too. "Is what I'm saying interesting enough?" "Does my walk look too awkward?" "Do they even like me? There's a constant buzzing in our head, broadcasting our flaws 24/7."

At some ages, it's much worse. When you're a teenager and everything you do in general is pretty awkward, it's easy to get super in your head, overthinking every little thing and wondering what others think too. It's not a fun experience, yet it seems to be a universal one.

I'm here to tell you though that it doesn't have to be this way. Obviously, we can't just wave a magic wand and fix all our insecurities, but what we can do is realize something- if we're all thinking these things, then who's actually thinking about us?

When I first learned about this concept in AP Psych in high school, it wasn't some earth-shattering revelation, but it was still enough to stick in my brain. The spotlight effect basically tells us that we all think that people are judging us, when in reality, they're too busy worrying about themselves. This can give you some of your freedom back.

People truly don't care what we're doing...so go nuts! Although, if you do go streaking through a public place, then people might take notice. We're mostly selfish creatures. We think about ourselves a lot. Even the most saintly of humans can attest to this. No one's going to care too much about how you live your life.

Suddenly society isn't as uncomfortable of a place anymore. The awkwardness of being alone in public can be seen as strength instead. That girl eating by herself in the dining hall is comfortable and confident enough to be alone. It doesn't mean she's dorky or has no friends; it just means that she's independent. She has (what the kids these days say, so if you don't get this reference- sucks to suck) main character energy.

Who else is tired of taking up so much of their head space worrying about what others think of them? I, for one, have too many other things to be stressing about to also nitpick over something I will never fully know for sure. We can't read minds (and if you can, pack it up, Professor X).

I'm currently suffering through a public speaking class for college (JK, this class is probably the least of my worries right now), and a big part of the pressure of speaking in front of others is making mistakes and the judgement that follows. However, something my professor said that stuck with me was that your audience can never tell how nervous you are. The things that seem glaringly obvious in our heads are miniscule out in the real world.

This doesn't just have to apply to the classroom though. I think awkward encounters seem much more to us than they do to others, and we need to remind ourselves that it might have been a big deal to you, but it probably didn't even show up on the radar of the other person.

I know this isn't an automatic cure-all and that social anxiety doesn't just melt off of people when they accept these words to be true, but it sure can ease a little bit of that worry.

We're all awkward humans that lack grace at times and lack the right words at times and lack bravery at times too. As soon as we realize that the person we project to the world isn't expected to be flawless, we realize how much better life can be.