Think about the title for a second. I have come to realize our cell phones have started to create anxiety about who we are, how many friends we have and what we look like. Our phone is filled with applications like Snapchat that give us the ability to open it and see what we look like at any time of the day. Older generations used to have to actually go out of their way to look in the mirror to see what they looked like, but now we have access to it at our fingertips.

This is something my younger sisters and their friends have a hard time realizing and accepting. You aren’t expected to look flawless after a run, long day of school, work or running errands. The funny part is people used to never think about it, but if you get a Snapchat from someone, then you automatically open it and look at yourself in the camera screen deciding if you want to respond or not. Snapchat recently introduced a new “photoshop” filter that takes out freckles, blemishes and makes your skin tone all one color. Young girls and guys are getting the idea that this is the “ideal.” You “could” look this good, but you need the filter. Who is Snapchat to tell us what are imperfections are?

If I have learned one thing this summer, then it is to build people’s confidence by being completely genuine and real with them. My sisters are starting to talk about girls in their grade watching their weight, replacing hanging out with friends to work out and dieting. They are 14. Girls that age shouldn’t have to be worrying about their appearance.

Cell phones warp our self-perceptions and build our appearance expectations based on the bloggers, celebrities and fitness accounts that we see. This summer more than other time in my life I have realized how insignificant my phone is. I don’t like to text, GroupMe and Snapchat as much. It just feels so refreshing to disconnect from technology and live in the moment. You really start to differentiate between the two types of people: those who make their phones a priority and those who don’t.

The evolution of the phone has created such efficiency for our world, but it should not be completely altering how we live our lives. It’s great to be able to photograph spontaneous moments, talk to friends whenever we want, check emails and stay connected with the world around us. Do it in moderation. Just like anything in life you shouldn’t overindulge in something that is so intangible and meaningless. You could be spending 15 minutes talking to your mom asking about her day and life, instead of sitting on the couch tapping through Snapchat stories I guarantee you won’t think about once the next day.

We could actually start accepting and seeing ourselves as more than just our appearance and start seeing our lives as our own in comparison to others. It’s OK not to have it together all the time. Your true relationships will last because of who you are with them in person. No relationship can remain digital and the more time you spend with someone in person, the more you realize how much you like them. You value the relationship for who they are when they are with you, not who they are over the cell phone where things are misinterpreted constantly.