We all have that friend. You know the one. The first one to tell you that dress isn't as cute as you think it is. Or that guy you've liked for pretty much ever is a raging tool. Or the dye job you just got is less than flattering. Or, as much as everyone is telling you different, that was a stupid thing to do. If you can't identify them in your friend group, it's probably you. And there's nothing wrong with that.

I'm the brutally honest friend in my friend group. Always have been, and probably always will be. I have a zero tolerance for all things bullshit-related, and I'm pretty sure I'm incapable of sugarcoating things. More often than not, this comes off as sounding bitchy or mean or rude, but the intention could not be further from that. I just can't fathom looking someone dead in the eye and saying exactly what they want to hear, when what they want to hear is nowhere close to the truth.

Life is hard for everybody. There are breakups and deaths and boyfriends that cheat and bosses that fire you and days when nothing seems to go right and on and on. Being helpless and hopeless is a universal feeling. Sometimes things just suck and there's nothing you can really do about it. And that's fine. It's just a a part of the cycle. But we need to face those things, confront them head on. Acknowledge the hurt and disappointment and betrayal, and allow those things to let us grow rather than harp on them until our stomachs ache.

One of the biggest parts of being the brutally honest friend in any friend group is constantly having to be the one to bring this up. That it's okay to be hurting, and it's okay to not be okay. Sometimes that's just the reality of it all. Things are just bad. Simple as that. In order to keep growing and living as emotionally mature individuals, we need to address these things. Maybe your friend isn't trying to be mean, but give you some insight into life, because as much as we hate to admit it, not everything is sunshine and rainbows day after day after day.

I wish people reciprocated the honesty I dole out so naturally. However, this is usually not the case. People are typically far too turned off by my ability to so freely speak my mind, but I've grown accustomed to that, as most honest people do. Not everybody can handle the frank realities of their lives, and I try to remember that. I don't open my mouth with the intention of crumbling people's self-esteem or being cripplingly mean. But if I sat here serving platitude after platitude of praise and goodness when praise and goodness are nowhere to be found, who wins in that situation? I'd be a shitty friend, and you'd be making poorer life decisions.

I've gotten used to the fact that honesty is a hard pill to swallow for a lot of people. I also know that a lot of people appreciate it. Having the courage to honestly assess a given situation is often under-valued, but it takes guts. We don't like to see our friends or family in a poor light, but having the foresight to know that not everybody is perfect and not every situation is so clear-cut is important.

So while I know people will keep mistaking honesty for an attitude problem, I'll keep being honest. I don't think I have another choice.